Old school hip hop bounced around the the gym’s rafters. Despite the industrial fans the air was soup. Nearly every treadmill was occupied with weekend warriors. On neighboring ellipitcals, Aisha and Carmen laughed.

“No she didn’t. Not a schedule for the bathroom. That’s taking assigned seating to the nth degree,” Carmen said with a cackle.

“Evelyn has a timetable for everything. When we arrive, when we can leave, what we should bring as a goddamned hostess gift. This Thanksgiving has more planning infrastructure than the battle of Normandy,” Aisha said. “I told Maxwell put a fork in me ‘cause I’m done.”

At the clubhouse, a hushed murmur of lunch guests wafted out to the patio. Despite the outdoor heaters and festive mums, few diners braved the brisk outdoor space. Tommy ordered another round while his buddy Max stabbed at his french fries.

“Can you believe Aisha is kicking off stuff with my people? Now she won’t go to my brother’s for Thanksgiving because she’s has a problem with his wife. I mean Evelyn is kinda of uptight, but it’s family. One day a year, is that too much to ask?” Max said. What can I do stuck between my wife and my family?”

Without looking up from his phone, Tommy nodded. “Women. Can’t live with them. Period. Wait, is Evelyn the one with the eye thing or the uptight one? The one with all the sexy piercings can cook my turkey.”

Aisha pressed the exercise equipment’s controls to pump up the resistance. She pedaled faster as Carmen danced in place to the banger blaring from the speakers. A trainer walking by with a client gave them a friendly wave and a very friendly wink.

“I put up with Evelyn’s nonsense last Thanksgiving. You remember the whole potato salad incident. So when I saw in the family group text that we had to submit the recipe for the item we would bring to this year’s dinner. I knew who that was directed to. That was directed at me. Me! I’m not going to apologize for properly seasoning my food. That is what I’m not going to do,” Aisha said, shaking her head. “I texted back that unfortunately I had plans for the holiday and to have a good time without me.”

“Good Lord and pass the Lawdry’s. You are a grown ass woman. You have the right to not have a miserable salt and pepper time. I bet his mother lost her religion after that text. I hope Max had your back,” Carmen said.

The waitress cleared their table. A few more golfers had settled onto the patio. Savoring the heat, Tommy plucked another jalepeno off his nachos and ate it. Max put down his burger to check his vibrating phone.

“Damn! that’s my mom. My whole family is blowing up my phone. My whole fam, Tommy. It’s not like I haven’t put up with her crazy family nonsense. Her Uncle Chem Trails that believes we evolved from dolphins. Talking to him at every cookout costs me brain cells. I’m putting my foot down. We are both going to Evelyn and Mike’s and that’s final,” Max said, taking a savage bite of his sandwich.

“You do that, soldier. Put your whole leg down. Lay down the law or your woman will lead you around by the nose. Show her who’s boss. And don’t worry Carmen and I have a guest room you can stay in,” Tommy said, snorting.

Toweling her neck, Aisha shifted into cool down mode. Still dancing on her machine this time to a slow jam, Carmen picked up her phone. Carmen read her husband’s text and then posted a selfie of her workout.

“You’ll be straight with me Carmen. Do you think I’m being too harsh? Max was said the decison is up to me but I could tell he was unhappy. I really don’t want to cause drama and create problems.”

“Look, Tommy and I have been together since the jurassic period. When it comes to drama, I am Laurence Olivier. Tommy’s the entire Broadway cast of Our Town. At family getogethers, I could bring the whole drama department including the adjunct professors and he could pull the fire alarms and lock the theater exits. We are past caring. But you and Maxwell are young love, see. So you’ll compromise with each other. Eat thanksgiving dinner someplace romantic and then visit the land of bland for a quick dessert with a pre-approved hostess gift. Enjoy young love while it lasts, babe. All this food talk is making me hungry, let’s skip the rest of leg day for nachos."