The bright red autumn leaves on the ground marked my path like a trail of blood through the graveyard. Everyday for a year I had walked this path.

Past the chipped tombstones and cold stone angles. Past the old groundskeeper who looked at me with pity in his eyes, right to the beautiful grey tombstone near the oak tree. Sighing I stopped in front of it. I had no more tears left to cry but I had plenty of quiet sighs and silent regrets.

A sort of nervous excitement danced in me as I bent down to pick up yesterday’s flowers and replace them with today’s. Today I had chosen bright yellow Birdsfoot Trefoil. The flowers of revenge. They stood out against the soft orange and reds of the autumn graveyard.

Even though it happened a year ago every time I close my eyes I see happening as though it was yesterday.

I hear his terrible singing and contagious laughter. The swaying of the car along the mountain road. The flash of red as the other car came from no where. The glimpse of the face in the red cars windscreen. Then the fear and panic that clawed through my chest as we fell. Then the stillness afterwards.

I remember the way his scent of pine and citrus slowing was bleached away by the stench of blood and cleaning products. The way his eyes seemed to open one last time then fell closed just as the machine stopped its steady beeping. And the months afterwards of endless tears and black dresses.

I don’t need to remember the ache in my heart because I feel it everyday.

A bird called to its mate in the distance snapping me from my train of thought and returning my attention back to the tombstone.

A tombstone is more than just a stone. It is a legacy, a hundred promises and a thousand memories. It’s eternal, the legacy is set in stone. The memories will always remain with me. But today I just had two promises too honour. Promises made through half sobs on rainy days in the graveyard. I had a waited a year too fulfil them and now it was time.

1. Never forget. Everyday I did this. Everyday I would continue to do this. Today especially.

2. Right a wrong. This was the promise that gave me jitters both from nerves and excitement.

A small smile crept onto my face. Everyday I had been planning. Everyday for a year I had been getting ready. And now I finally was.

The small smile stayed on my face as I reached into my coat pocket and my fingers came to rest on the cold metal of the gun. I strode from the graveyard without looking back.

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