They never should have told me how smart I am. What good could that do me? It only makes me feel like a screwup whenever things go wrong, as if I could have foreseen it, done it better somehow with my miraculous gifts. But I’m just a regular guy, and I do my best.

Shouldn’t I be rich by now? Shouldn’t I have cured cancer? What have I done with my life?

That’s all just to say, I’m stuck at the bottom of a well. It’s dry down here, with only a shaft of light separating me from darkness. I think my leg is broken. I’ve been screaming for hours and my vocal cords are shredded. I’m probably going to die down here.

The smartest guy in my class, the valedictorian, and I can’t stop myself from falling into a giant hole in the ground. It’s not that I didn’t see it; I was paying attention and watching where I was going. It’s just that I was curious about it. I’d never seen an old timy well like this, and I was messing around. I stuck my head in so I could yell and hear the acoustics, lost my balance, and down I went.

If I had a lighter I could start a fire , take off my shirt and burn it. The smoke might get someone’s attention. If I wore glasses the lens could be used to capture sunlight and spark a flame.

If I could dig into the wall and get to some more water, I could flood the well and float or swim to the top. That’s what I started doing, digging into the floor with my hands, and then I found a piece of rock that I used to scrape dirt out. It took a long time, handfuls of dirt at a time, my fingers bleeding, grit between my teeth.

Then finally, the hole started flooding. Water soaked through my clothes and relieved the pain in my leg, and it kept coming. I laid on my back and floated as it rose, carrying me upward from the darkness into the twilight near the mouth of the well.

The water didn’t take me all the way to the top, but it brought me far enough that I could get a handhold on the stone near the well’s mouth. I yanked my body up and pulled myself over the lip, to settle on grass, the most wonderful and lovely grass I’ve ever felt.

I set myself to army crawl the mile back to my car where my cell phone was. I shook my head. I’m not sure what being the smartest got me: I was curious enough to stick my head in the well, and a good enough problem solver to get myself out. But I just wish I was smart enough not to break my leg and almost die.