The King Of Nothing

I went to the barber, thanked my barber and went home to my flat

I didn’t look in any side mirrors intentionally to not spoil the big reveal

I open my bathroom door, turn on the lights, and prepare to admire my new freshly shaped head


I ask myself

“Do I still get an eyebrow slit at 30?”


I sit down on my couch and fiddle with my keys

I run them through my fingers like thread

Prodding the top of my room key with my index finger

like flicking a guitar string or whatever


five minutes later I move on to the fidget spinner on my table I’ve had for as long as I’ve had an eyebrow slit

It’s chrome plated





The sun going down on the horizon, the shift of the sky from a pleasant light blue to a rust orange glow tells me I’ve literally been doing this for 30 minutes

I get up and start pacing around my room in a figure 8

Giving myself a bit off a tour

Through my kitchen, the marble table clean but dusty

The fridge, large and barren,

My bedroom, with a guitar propped on the wall

My guitar.

My introspection was interrupted by a knock at my door

The chrome plated fidget spinner dropping from my hand on to my toe, shattering

I want to cry, for multiple reasons, or none at all

I walk to my door and peep outside

A curious looking group was standing there

“The ren fair ended a week ago”

I felt bad instantly and opened my mouth to apologize when I heard quiet muttering

“……did the invisibility spell really not work?”

A strong female voice asks

“That means it’s him.”

A gruff male retorts

“Um, hello?”

I begin to ask

the door exploded off its hinges and into my face

Flying through the air I landed on my back and used the momentum to roll over, kicking the door over my head and rolling onto my feet

Looking up at this group my eyes widen

These are not costumes.

I spring to my feet, terrified, and realize I have no choice to attack

I lunged at the large man who had the gruff voice, his black long hair held in a top knot, donned in black ranger gear with a sword and a cape, figuring I take the tuffest one out first


The female with the strong voice, donning red hair and a freckled constellation like face with pointed ears that added to her larger than life appearance screamed.

The inflection in her voice changing softer made me want to hear her out

Suddenly, the short person in a cloak pulled out a large metal and wood staff (that resembled a soft serve swirl) levitated the door back into its original position

“We mean no harm, sir”


The robed man added

“My condolences, I didnt expect the heir to the kingdom to have such a weak door”

I almost got offended but to be fair the door was creaky and faded


Silence permeated in the air for a second, as they looked at me with an almost admiration and my nerves began to settle.

“So, uh, what do you want and why am I heir?”

They group together and mutter

“Of course he doesn’t know he’s an heir he was placed in this world for protection”

“Well if you figured that why would you cast explosion at his door Alexis”

“Hindsight is 20/20 Terry”


The large one chucked at this argument

“Shut up, Clyde”

They suddenly shift their attention back to me

“Do you have any injuries, sir” Tera asks?

“Um yeah, on my big toe”

“Let me try to help!”

She used her hands and a glorious gold glow eminates from them, a river-like stream flows from her hands to my big toe

It was magical, like if the stars at night had a golden backdrop that made them glow even brighter

It did nothing.

“It is him.” Clyde whispered, eyes wideing.

What am I?

“The heir, sir” Alexi gleefully states

“you are the chosen one, the one said to be devoid of magic and therefore impervious to it”

Not surprising, my entire life, I’ve been told by everyone including myself I don’t have much “magic”

No special talent in even my passions, no drive or dreams to boot

Alexis’ statement made me realize why I wanted to cry.

I look down

And look straight at him

“Cast a fireball at my face”

“WHAT” they all scream

“If I am this “heir”, please do what I ask”

“But si”


Alexis slowly raises their wands from their cloak, and conjures a fireball towards my face

The air tenses as he shoots it, sparks begin to form and the entire room glows red, redder as the ball shot towards my face like a comet careening onto earths surface

It makes contact, bursting instantly and dissipating into nothing just as fast

I smile

Besides the sound hurting my ears, I felt nothing

They stood shocked and I decided

If being without “magic” is my power, I can still be something.

Tera shakily made a statement that filled everyone with a renewed sense of adventure and longing.

“Sir, you are the heir”

“And we have no time to waste”

“It’s time for you to come home”

I look around.

The fridge, the table, my bedroom

It definetely wasn’t home

“Lead me to it, please”

I was filled with a sense of purpose to nothing. To be nothing, and to let that lead me to something.

Tera added “the enemy forces could be trying to reach you now, so we must make haste”

That’s all I needed to hear.

And as we began to embark on this journey into anything, I realized my nothingness was my superpower

It gave me the ability to be anything

And after leaving my flat I realized two others things

I missed my fidget spinner

And my foot still hurt.

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