I wrote a little note on my phone to remind myself that I needed to have this conversation with my mom. All the kids at school were doing it and I almost did it. It freaked me out, I was scared, shaking, and shivering. Something about seeing a private part made me fearful and I needed to know why.

“Hey, mom can I ask you something,” I said looking at the window playing with my fingers, and turning blue in the face.

“Yes, what it is,” mom said

“All my friends are having sex at school and … I almost did it but I was too scared”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU ALMOST DID IT” my mom yelled at me and then apologized quickly. Baby, what do you mean you almost did it? What day was this and are you okay? I’m sorry for yelling at you. Please forgive me.

This was the first time my mom ever apologized for something that I thought she’d kill me over, maybe it was serious to her and that would be my follow-up question. She continued to proceed to make me feel the most comfortable that I’ve ever felt before. I liked this feeling but I was unsure if it was ever going to stay. For this reason, I embraced it.

“ I forgive you, mom, I know this is a hard topic for parents to talk about with their kids, now can I go on”

“Yes, please go on”

“ Okay, so it was time for lunch but I didn’t want lunch so I and my friend ( mom interrupts and asks me who my friend was, I told her a made-up name) went outside to just talk, the question was floating around about sex and what position girls liked the most”” what are positions? I asked my mom.

Her eyes got so big like they were going to pop out of her head and she started to walk around the house while talking.

“Okay, I’m going to need for you to sit down, while I walk around. It’s just easier for me that way” she said.

“ Positions are a certain way a person will put their body in to perform the sexual activity, does that make sense”?

“Kinda. How many are there”

“There are a lot of different ones, some people like more than others, do you need further explanation of what a sex position is before we go any further”?

“No, I think I got it” I continued.

“ Because I was trying to fit in with all the rest of the girls, I said that mine was the doggy style, mom when I said that it was like the boys got excited, of course, I have no idea what that was but the job I was trying to do was done, I got the attention of John, I really think he’s cute”

“Omg, go on,” my mom said holding her head while she finished walking around.

“It got Johns's attention to and after the bell rung for everyone to go back to class, he grabbed my hand and told me to go with him. All the girls went with the other boys too. I went with him”

Okay, okay my mom said. She came down to sit next to me. She put her hand on my knee and said:

“I know why you were freaked and scared. The doggy style position is a position that advanced people do when they have been having sex for some time and you haven’t seen the other sex's private part. That was a little bit too much for you because you don’t know anything just as yet. Also, sweetheart, just because you think a guy is cute doesn’t mean that you have to sleep with him, other things come before you two even get to that part. I’m so proud of you and proud that you didn’t actually do it. We will talk about this more after dinner, are you okay”

She gave me the longest hug and the most affectionate kiss she has ever given me. Then we went off to dinner.