The rumbling army drew closer.

She was out of time. The oracle had specified this precise location. The air was windy. The compass was glowing. Everything was as described. What was she missing?

The rumbling grew louder.

A ring of stone began to spin underneath her, glowing with letters in a language she did not recognise as a glowing object began to be assembled in the air.

Battle horns sounded outside. The sound of chants began to roll into the gaps of the cave above.

The humming glowing object was nearing completion. She would not let panic consume her.

This relic would save her people.

This relic would empower her.

This relic would liberate our generations to come.

A thundering crack appeared in the wall across the cave.

They were beginning to breach the entrance. There was no time to wait for the finished assembled artefact.

She lunged at the glowing energy.

The vibrancy pulsed through her fingertips, sending shivers down her spine. The weight of its power threatened to overwhelm her, yet she clung to it, determined to harness its potential.

But as she stood there, caught in the thrall of the relic’s power, a sudden realization struck her. This wasn’t just any ancient artifact.

It was a cheese grater.

Impossible. The textures were indeed extravagant, its power undeniable. But how would this serve as a tool of war?

Confused but undeterred, her resolve hardens. This nonsensical kitchen utensil will simply have to slice through enemies as easily as it did cheddar.

With a mixture of determination and bemusement, she turned towards the cave’s crumbling entrance as the army began to breach the rocks before her.

And she laid waste to them.

With the power of cheese.