I’ve created a monster

by laying bare my cards

and letting you go

I fed it the shards

of my rain-soaked bones

and watched it fatten

in a season where leaves have fallen

The pain has morphed into something even more difficult to describe

a lingering tremor

like Big Bang’s leftover noise

i took a shower in the dark just now

because electricity was out

i lit a candle to place in my wash basin

you said “how romantic”

a typical thing you’d say about a situation

that obviously demanded a different response

you always reacted differently

to my expectations

and it often made me think

maybe we indeed don’t belong

None of that really matters now

because i’ve created a monster that howls

a monster who weeps

and mewls at the undying afterglow of a bonfire

or a candle as it drips scorching tears

This metaphor makes even more sense

when “Afterglow” is your favourite song

i’ve created a monster who rages against an impossibility, someone who knows what’s coming about

a monster who dies

when the lights go out