I wanted him to stay, but he had to go. I knew my sheer will couldn’t keep him here, but I still tried as I sat crying over him.

His soft fur brushing my temple as I felt him take his last breaths.

My heart ached like it got punched as I whispered over and over to him.

“I love you, my sweet boy. Good boy, good dog. I love you so much.” My voice choked off as I sobbed, my family mourning with me.

His soft breath filled the air along with our sobs as our family member lay dying.

I didn’t want him to go, but I knew he had to. With love, comes loss… that is the price we pay for love—death.

But I know it is not the end, even though it hurts like heck… I have hope that we will meet again in Heaven and I will be with all of my family, and dogs.

Tears ran down my face as I kissed him one last time and let him go.

Some say time is a gift, and you should live every moment you have. And I agree… but with loss it grips you and won’t let go even if it slowly fades over time. There is still that ache and physical pain of not being able to see them again, touch them, call out their name. It cripples you and drowns you in a dark hole you can’t seem to get out of and that won’t let you go.

But then when it feels like it will never end, that it will never let you smile again… you start to heal. Little by little you joy comes back and the weight of grief lifts off your shoulders inch by inch.

Letting you breathe.

The loss and grief is still there, under the surface, but you can survive it. You can bear it. And you remember the times that you had fondly, and hold onto that hope.