have you ever slept so little

that when the morning came,

all you could do was move slowly

and try not to fall asleep?

on these days it feels like im being piloted by someone else

someone that i shut down when i was eleven,

because she was too run-down

and tired

spending three years without a power source

dreaming of running through fields green and gold

now all she can do is try not to fall asleep

because these veins aren’t wires

and this heart’s not a motor

and these muscles aren’t pistons

and this brain’s not a motherboard

but good god,

sometimes it feels that way