Man I knew I shouldn’t have eatin those mushrooms now I’m tripping balls. So much so that now am imagining I’m at a Salem witch trial and I’M the one on trial. “I ask you again warlock, confess your sins and we will set you ablaze where ye shall be cleansed of all evil.”

Yeah because burning to death sounds fun. Whatever none of this is real anyway, mind as we’ll have some fun. “YES tis I. I am the witch er- warlock of the ugh Northern Lights, yeah that.” They gasped and started pointing there pitchforks at me calling me the devil. “Now now if I were truly the devil I assure you all . . . I would look way hotter than this.”

And then I saw a man throw a torch at me and it actually hurt. Like, real ass burn wound pain. “oh shit.”