I see you lying still and I think “That’s not you. You’re gone. That thing is not you.” Just a normal body Sitting in the bathtub Maybe this girl’s on her period Because the water’s red and smells like death. She can’t be you Because you were never still. Always moving, always You would never lie so still. I can’t feel anything. It can’t be you. It’s not you. You’re not gone. But you are. It’s you the bathtub And it’s not water. I sink down beside you I add tears to the blood that was once yours. When did you decide the other side of death Was better than living another day with me? What did I do to screw you up so bad What did I do? My heart lies there with you. You’ll keep it forever. The scar it leaves aches with pain I’m empty And you’re not there to fill me up. You’re gone. Please come back to me I still need you. I’ll love you harder I’ll listen more I’ll bleed, anything I’ll do anything to get you back Just come back Please save me from myself Before I die the way you did. Because you aren’t here to hold me I’d do anything to get you back in my arms You’re gone. Why could I not have seen how much pain you were in? Is somebody else hiding a pain this big? Why would they want to stay? Why should I matter if you left me? I feel hollow and full of pain at the same time Why should I dump this pain on anyone else? It’s only mine. Please don’t leave me. I need you to point me up in this world But you can’t. You’re gone. You’re gone. And you’re never coming back. And there’s nothing I can do to change that. I know I was part of what made you do it. I know I screwed up. So all I can do is apologize until I see you again. So I’m sorry. I’m sorry for not listening. I’m sorry for being gone when you were breaking. I’m sorry for telling you to wait. I’m sorry for not loving you like I should have. I’m sorry for making you feel alone. I’m sorry.