I hit the ball and watch it soar into the sky, it’s the best bat I’ve pulled yet. But nobody is staring at that, nobody is encouraging me to run or anything. Screw them! I’m not letting this moment go to waste!

“Xena” Mrs. Wheatcroft our PE teacher approaches me cautiously from across the pitch. I scowl at her, telling her she’s ruined the game, I could have gotten a home run.

“Fion go grab Xena a jumper from the spare kit box please” she directs the conversation to the girl behind me, waiting her turn.

Fion runs off to get a jumper and I stand frozen in place. Confused and a little worried. Why is everyone staring at me? Why are they whispering like I’m some exhibit??? I’m furious and demand someone tell me what has happened.

Fion comes back and Wheatcroft pulls me off to the side. Fion hands the jumper to her and she hands it to me.

“Tie this around your waist and go visit the nurse” she encourages me as she nods for Fion to go with me. I look down to my waist expecting to see a large mud stain or something ridiculous, not worth this much attention, I don’t expect to see a line of blood running down my leg towards my fresh white sock. I look up to Wheatcroft who looks at me sympathetically. I tie the jumper around my waist and run, away from my class, away from Fion, and away from the situation.

I sit in the changing room desperately wiping at my leg with wet paper towels but it just leaves a dark red blotch of dried blood instead like a semi-permanent reminder. I want to cry, but I can’t embarrass myself anymore than I already feel. I get changed back into my uniform, collect my bag and run out the door. I barge past Wheatcroft on the way out who calls for me to come back. I practically leap out of the main gate and speed down the road, running as if I were doing the home run I never got to do because of this blasted blood! I have one location in mind, I need to find my Mum.

I knew she went into town today, but the town is huge and I have no idea which shop she could be in. After half an hour of wandering aimlessly I slump down on a bench next to the town fountain. A pigeon approaches.

“Oh you poor dear you look awful.” I thank her with a huff and she jumps back in shock. I’ve always been able to understand animals, it was the gift given to me at birth. Now I have another “gift” , the gift of womanhood I’m sure everyone will tell me. I don’t want it. Not that I have any issue with being a woman, I love women. In … every way. But it just doesn’t feel like the right time. I don’t want this, not right now!

The pigeon hops onto the bench next to me and tries consoling me, but I just want Mum. And she’s nowhere to be found. I bury my face in my hands and close my eyes. I think of her, how much I need her and an image comes into my mind. It's a hand picking a pink shirt off the rail. My eyes start walking over to a mirror now standing in front of me and I see my Mum’s reflection looking back. This isn’t just a thought of my Mum. This is me looking through Mum’s eyes! I know exactly where she is now, maybe today wasn’t so giftless after all?