My vision is blurred my memories are gone , processed with grief on this long walk home. Things are clouded darkened unclear, specs of long buried trauma that quickly appear. The time is approaching for me to heal but how can I proceed wha what I don't feel. I've suppressed so much hurt I don't remenber who to blame, what traumas to claim, who was the first perpetrator to cause this discomfort and pain . I wanna see you, so I can place blame so I can tell you what you've done to me and make you face the shame. The name calling disappointed stares, I want you to bear the anguish of raising a child without the father there. Your name unknown your DNA substantial. I can sense your soul ties on me but don't know if that's factual. My vision is blurred.