“Kai!” I screamed.

I had just gotten back from the kitchen. Kai was waiting for me in the door way.

“Kai,” I screamed again, as I watched him fall to the ground. Everything seemed to be in slow motion.

I ran to Kai dropping the blanket and picnic basket.

He was gone, the one thing that was never supposed to happen. I held him close to my chest as I looked up at the bright blue sky tears streaming down my face.

“Kai,” I whispered, “Please don’t leave me.”

“He’s gone,” Aaron was standing near the door, I hadn’t even noticed him until now.

I looked at him taking a shaky breath, “You did this. He’s your brother.”

Aaron laughed, “He was my brother. He’s dead now.”

I stood up, “You think this is funny! He died.”

Aaron walked over to me, “Maybe you shouldn’t be so quick to judge. You and him were fighting-weren’t speaking.”

I looked down and Kai, “We were trying to fix that.”

Aaron put a hand on my shoulder, “And it was your fault in the first place, wasn’t it. You told him you had to leave. And for what? You only found pain after you left.”

I took a shaky breath, “It was the worst mistake of my life.”

Aaron nodded, “I guess we’re all entitled to our mistakes. Even Kai, he made a mistake just now. You see I came to put a stake through your tiny human heart. But Kai, he wouldn’t let me get through. He said not to touch you. So you shouldn’t be blaming me. Really you shouldn’t be blaming anyone but you. If you had never fought with Kai you wouldn’t be here trying to fix your mistakes. And I wouldn’t be here either. The only reason I came here was to kill you. After you left my brother, he was never the same. You broke his heart so I came to steal yours. Everything that happened here was your fault.”

I fell back down to the ground. Aaron was right. I had killed Kai. It was all my fault.

“He sacrificed his life to save mine… after all I did… after all the suffering he went through because of me.”

Aaron nodded, “Yep, but now I see this as a better punish met for you. Living with pain, the same pain you made Kai suffer through for three years.”

I put my hands to my eyes and cried, “Km sorry. I’m so sorry.”

I wasn’t talking to Kai, or to Aaron. I didn’t know who I was talking to.

I stayed with Kai until the night fell, the stars looked so bright. It felt like they were taunting me, reminding me of what me and Kai used to have.

I walked home and sat down on my bed.

The first thing I did was grab a piece of paper. I wrote a letter to Kai and then on to myself. My future self.

I walked back to Kai’s house, his body had been buried behind his favorite tree, Enzo made sure of it.

I stood at the tree holding the letter in my hands.

I set the letter down, and walked away preparing to forget my life, my life with Kai any way.

He had died for me, and now I had to make his memory dead to me. I had to move on.

My Grandma once told me there’s no such thing as moving on, you just get to it. But I couldn’t do that I had to move on. I had to forget I ever loved Kai. Even though it meant erasing evey good thing that ever happened to me. I couldn’t live with so much pain.

I had to forget.