When my mind wraps me up in its dark embrace, I am not afraid now because it is familiar it is mine.

Maybe that’s why I always grovel back on my knees to the demons that kept me bound for so long. Because their hand was what I knew,

what I had only wished to lose until without it I was lost.

Without it, I didn’t know who to be.

Now I am not afraid when I resign when I let it in when I let it consume me to my depths. Because nothing has been left untouched anyway. Nothing belongs to me that does not belong to the darkness. Nothing, when my only comfort from the suffering is the acceptance.

I’m done fighting back the black hole. The more I bite and kick, the worse the end will be.