“i have to go to greece tomorrow”

i assumed you were having another

breakdown or midlife crisis

“why?” i asked

your best friend’s mother was dead

“oh.” is all i said

because what am i supposed to say?

i knew her, of course i did

ever since i was a baby

brightly coloured lipstick and a

lust for life- the ultimate rejection of

her old age

am i supposed to feel something?

because i don’t feel much of anything

but i am sorry for their loss

your best friend needs you

and so you’ll fly away tomorrow

to wipe away her tears

it did make me think, though

about what will happen when i grow older

and death starts to reap my friends

i’ve never been good with grief

or processing any kind of emotion really

so i sit here in silence

but don’t take my reaction personally

i haven’t felt anything in a while

i guess that’s the truth

so, you have to go to greece tomorrow

and i hope that death doesn’t come

back for a long while

but i guess we can’t control that any more

than the changing of the tides

or the love within our hearts

i’ll see you on sunday, though

i’ll have done two exams by then

don’t feel bad- i want you to go

because while numbness may hold my hand

anguish tugs on your heart

so it’s the least that i can do

“i’ve booked my flight now,

the funeral will be on friday”

“that’s soon”

“that’s how it is in greece”

the long silence rang in my head

“oh.” is all i said