Turning my back on her is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

Hearing the broken hearted, mournful sobs takes a piece of my soul away as I step toward the door. Each step is more sure than the last, the relief I feel to be stepping away so potent it’s tangible. But with that relief comes a sorrowful guilt, that I feel relieved to walk away from the woman I vowed myself to forever.

“You know I can’t stay, Rowena,” I murmur out half heartedly, but there is no fight left in my voice. Just simple defeat, absolute indifference. Perhaps if this had occurred a decade ago I would feel more inclined to fight for this illusion of love. But with everything in the open, I see no point.

“Do you regret it, at the very least?” I asked as I gather my cloak in my hands, sweeping the thick fabric around my shoulders, whilst mentally hoping it would be enough to counter the bitter weather outside. It has to be enough, given I can’t bear to stay in this house a moment longer. This house is but shell of empty promises of a home. It is simply the place I’ve lived out this elaborate lie, this perpetual act.

“..No. I stand by my actions,” Rowena mumbled, her voice filled with shame. I spare her a disgusted glance, catching a glimpse of her ethereal jade hued eyes fixed to me with such a poignant sense of agony that I immediately look away. I still cannot comprehend how she holds no regret for the damage she has inflicted on an innocent family with her actions.

“You stand by this con?” I demand, my voice deceptively soft compared to the boiling anger rolling through my veins with each weighted thud of my heart. I clench my jaw, my teeth creaking at pressure, as I snatch one of the burlap sacks from the counter. Though I attempt to distract myself with packing whatever my hands touch first, Rowena’s next works make me freeze entirely.

“It was not a scam.” She said, coldly. Calmly. I drag my tongue over my teeth as I reign in my disgust, the utter loathing growing in place of the love I felt for her the day before. I turn to her fully this time, my eyes locking determinedly to hers as I stare at her across the room.

Tears drop down her cherubic face, her rose stained cheeks standing out against the soft ivory of her skin. Her eyes, a brilliant hue of green that would put the purest emerald to shame, hold a sense of conviction I’m unused to. That conviction is what I find to be the straw that broke the camels back.

Where is that conviction when it comes to us? To me? There is none. All that motivates Rowena is what she can benefit from, and this act of risking not only herself but the last of my heart…I cannot forgive her. I will not be the pathetic doormat she uses on any longer, enduring the pain of being trampled on simply in hopes of her being pleased with my service to her.

And just like that, the emotional dam I had built up crashed down ruthlessly. Words escape me before I have time to comprehend what I’m saying.

“I always knew this arrangement to marry you would be a risk but this? This is unethical, Rowena!” I blurt, my eyes narrowing as I pull back my lip in a sneer. Rowena at least has the sense to look wary as she pushes her auburn ringlets of hair away from her face and shifts on her feet.

“You cannot. I forbid it. You are not bringing him back.” I say, the finality to my tone seeming to break through Rowena’s entire composure as her face twists into an expression of disbelief.

“He didn’t need to die, I can bring him ba-“

“After what happened when you tried to bring back your mother?! Rowena, where is your common sense? You have fed that family false hopes!” I retort, my voice growing louder with each passing word, the air around me heating as I ball my hands into fists.

“That was different, and I was alright wasnt I?!” She demands, her eyes meeting mine, filled with tears of plea. A plea to allow her to do this? This abomination of nature? Never.

“You were alright because I used alchemy to give you half of my heart, and now you want the other half?! Fucking earn it!” I snap, turning on my heel and walking briskly out of the house and into the frigid snow