Mother always brought me with her to visit the terminally ill patients. Even though it’s just because she’s a nurse and needs to work late, so she brings me. I still seem to think it’s because of something else.

My mental health. Anxiety is one of the monsters I’m battling. And my social abilities . . . Let’s just say I’ve never really connected with someone.

“Adrian!” Mother calls to me.

“Coming!” I call back, tears burning in my eyes. I stare at the empty bed, a bed that used to have Lily. Mother warned me about this. But I couldn’t help myself.

Lily was special. One of a kind. The only person I truly loved.

“Adrian,” Mother walks to my side. “I know it’s hard.”

I turn to face her, “Why!” My voice is loud. Every moment that I ever shared with Lily flashes before my eyes.

The walks we took through the streets when she was feeling up to it. The moment when I looked into her pale blue eyes and knew she was who I’ve always been looking for.

“Why?” I ask again my voice cracking as I look at the cold ground.

Mother puts a hand on my shoulder, “It’ll get easier. Just know that you gave her the life she’s always wanted. You loved her.”

My eyes shoot up from the ground.

“I—“

Mother smiles, “Adrian I know.”

I feel my face heat up. My first instinct is to tell her she’s wrong. That me and Lily—the most beautiful girl I’d ever met—were nothing more than just friends.

“Did she . . .” I look at the ground sighing, “Was it painful for her to . . .”

Mother pulls me into a hug, “Shhhhh,” she whispers, “Don’t think about that. Just know that she had a great life.”

……………………….……………………………………….

Adrian,

I want my last words to you to be something you always remember.

Because you are someone I’ll always remember. And I know you’ll meet someone new and fall in love but, Adrian I’m saying it now. Even if I get to say it a thousand more times. I want you to know that I love you.

Lily