Isn’t it funny?

One minute, we’re running in circles. We’re happy. The next, we’re falling. Darkness holds us close. No, we never know when it’ll happen— or who it’ll happen to. There’s no way to know until it’s close enough.

Because one minute we’re okay. The next our family is crying over us. Tears are shed and colors are lost. Grey ash is left from the one who left. Sad faces and damp cloths. They tell you not to cry. But you do. Because you’re human and you’re selfish.

Everyone has lost someone or something close to them. Perhaps you only knew them for a day. Perhaps they were only a few hours old. But when they leave, something in your heart goes with them.

I don’t expect everyone to understand. But to those who do- I’m sorry. Because I hate feeling weak. I hate shaking and wondering why. I hate the downwards spiral of panic attacks and anxiety. Not being able to sleep or eat. Vomit comes quick, you’re pale and weak. And I know you hate it too.

Watching them hurt, struggle and fight. Hoping and praying they’re okay. But in the end- they’re too weak to keep fighting. So you fight for them. It’s what you do. And you fail. You fail.

Because our fate is sealed and we can do nothing to change it.

…

💔 For dad.

💗 For momma.

❤️‍🩹 For Mrs. Cathy.

💙 For Haden.

🤍 For Peanut.

❣️ For Ms. Porter.

💛 For Chiperina.

💚 For Mrs. Smith.

💖 For Mrs. Hart.

🖤 For Two-Point.

❤️ For Bones.

💘 For Rolly-Polly.

💛 For Sunny.

🤎 For Hazel.

💙 For Chip.

💖 For Snowball.

🤍 For Ruby.

💕 For Polly.

🤎 For Tiger.

💝 For Duke.

🧡 For Mr. Lance.

💜 For Kaylee and Tucker.

❤️‍🔥 …For Cookie

❤️‍🔥 …For Flame.

❤️‍🔥 …For Sugar.

❤️‍🔥 … For Flour.

❤️‍🔥… And for Coco…

I’m sorry I couldn’t save you. I fucking knew it and I couldn’t save you. Tried so hard, and it hurts so bad. No one would listen to me. I couldn’t make them listen. And this is what happened.

…

(Enter yours in the comments too. Anything you’ve lost, add their heart. They matter just as much.)