I have a pain in my groin. I hate heights. I hate my brother even more for roping me into this (pardon the pun). My heart is in my mouth. Pain in groin intensifying by the second. Bile is building up in my mouth. I’m going to die. The cord is going to snap. Worse still what if my neck snaps? What if I poop my pants? Who invented this stupid bungee jumping thing anyway?

I hate my brother (did I mention that already?) I’m going to kill him….

I want my mummy….