Dear Diary,

Well…last night was a total disaster, to say the least. Remember Damian? He’s the cyclops I met on that stupid app Pearl made me download, Romance Realm. I still can’t believe I had to pay a premium for underwater access… Anywho, since he was the one jumping realms just to see me, I thought I’d take initiative and plan the first date.

That, Diary, was mistake number one.

Damian mentioned in his profile that he can be a bit shy when you first meet him, so I wanted to pick something that made him feel comfortable and didn’t require much talking to start. But when we showed up to the movie theater (my oh-so-brilliant idea!), the only films playing were in 3D. At first, I didn’t see the problem; I mean, I love a good immersive film! But, as they slid the movie tickets across the counter, two pairs of 3D glasses were passed our way too—3D glasses with, you guessed it, two eye holes.

I. Was. Mortified.

And unfortunately, I wasn’t the only one. Damian’s embarrassment was painfully noticeable when I asked the girl behind the counter if they had any one-eyed pairs in the back. He quickly reassured us both that he’d be fine with the glasses they gave us and disputed my incessant apologies as we walked inside the theater. He even refused to let me pay for popcorn, despite my insistence on doing so to make up for the blunder.

By the time the movie started, I had recovered some of my confidence. I guess Damian was in the same boat, because as the lights dimmed, he did that cheesy (but adorable) thing where he fake yawned and slung an arm around my shoulders. It was impossible to pay attention to the movie after that, as the butterflies in my stomach were having a field day.

Did I say butterflies, Diary?

Yeah, at first that’s what I thought it was too. But by the time I noticed the warm bead of sweat plunge down my shoulder from his armpit (his, albeit sweaty, but sexy, woodsy smelling armpit) I had about three seconds to recognize the difference between butterflies and transformation before my freshly shaved legs floundered into a massive, slimy tail in the reclined chair.

Popcorn went flying, goo slopped to the floor, the woman next to me even screamed! And there I was…stuck (literally) enduring the most embarrassing moment of my life. Damian didn’t say, either out of kindness or because of the dim lighting, but I’m pretty sure my face was as red as my newly visible scales.

So, Diary, as you can imagine, I was convinced I would never hear from my realm-crossing cyclops hottie ever again. But even after a date as disastrous as last night's (and yes, I do consider my date carrying me to the concession stand and dabbing my tail with napkins to qualify as disastrous), there is still hope!

That’s all for now, Diary. Damian (shockingly) will be here in an hour to pick me up for dinner. And don’t worry, I’ve been assured he’s picked a dry, one-eye-inclusive restaurant. I will report back later tonight.

Wish me luck!

Coral