"When I say I work for Hero Force, people always ask me, what's your code name? And then I say 'the Janitor' and they're like 'oh wow, what kind of powers do you have?'

"And I say, 'Access to the cleaning supply closet.' Which doesn't seem like a superpower, until the fifth floor restroom's out of toilet paper.

"It's not a difficult job. You just gotta pay attention and plan ahead. If AquaKid's in the office today, you know you're gonna be refilling the paper towel dispensers twice as often, you know? And they're always calling me in to buff the scorch marks off the ceiling whenever The Incredible Volcano is in a meeting. I keep telling them we should invest in black paint, but no, they say that'll make us look too much like a villain's lair.

"All in all, it's not a bad gig. I mean you should see what the folks at the insurance companies have to deal with. I get dental."