I’ve always wanted to forgive him for treating me wrong. I’ve always wanted to forgive him for cheating. But, I knew I had to forgive myself first. Deep down inside, the thought of him being with someone else after I was all in for him for months hurt me. It hurt me bad. It hurt me to the point where I felt like giving up all over again. Was I ever enough? Did I do enough? These questions were always going through my head. But, It wasn’t the first time. No, not at all. It wasn’t the first time I felt like this. Even though he tried to take the blame for my depression, I know it wasn’t him. It was me. Even though he tried to tear me down. It wasn’t him that brung me in this hole, it was me. I did this, I hurt myself once again. I put myself in a cycle of endless pain everytime I dwell on a situation. So no, I cannot blame anyone for what happens to me because deep down I know it’s me. Its my fault.