Felipe, Uruguay

“We can afford it papí,” Mama coos and rests her hand on my shoulder before planting a big kiss on my head. “If it is your dream it is no problem.”

I take her hand in mine, but keep my eyes on the computer screen. An offer of acceptance from NYU.

Everything I have worked for, everything I have sweated for, came through and condensed in an email.

It is almost funny.

“It is...

I am always awake before Ben. I usually find myself at the foot of his bed, nestled in his rich bed blankets that smell like him but a little musty. As expected, noise starts on the circle thing on his table and he rolls over with a groan.

I can never understand that.

I am so happy to start another day.

I can already hear my table thumping.

Ben’s paws pat my head as he swings his legs over...

There is condensation on the window

Mould is creeping in

It greets me in the morning

The big wide view of trees and clouds and flashing airplanes

Pink and blue and purple and ice

The mould in the corner grumbles ‘good morning’

I wipe away the drops

I flick the radiator on

I cannot afford it

It doesn’t click on

The mould laughs...

In hindsight, I do not think it was a good idea to go on a run this morning.

David swears on a 10k after a night out.

I can see him now, sat on his quilted sofa with his right leg crossed over the left to reveal his navy cashmere quilted socks. He leans in and points a finger at nothing in particular.

“Coffee. Ten K. Cold shower. That’s it.”

David really can be such a prick some times.

No...

The glug of my glass makes me smile. The way the crisp white wine exits its bottle and slides down gratefully into my glass, landing with a glug, glug, glug.

I feel the flush of blood tinge my cheeks as Dave pulls the bottle away and I raise my glass to my lips.

Is this my fourth? Or maybe my fifth?

There’s so much chatter and music in the restaurant it’s now very hard to direct my thoughts....

I like a red admiral.

I read about it first on an aged poster in a cabin on the coast. Endless butterflies I hadn’t seen.

I only knew dependable cabbage butterflies.

No complexities.

I thought I was somewhere else.

With crashing waves, black sand and routes my uncle told me not to walk on.

I liked how it sounded. Commanding. Assured. Black and gold and red.

I remember the day I learn...

People are bad.

Right?

Have you ever held the door open for someone who hasn’t said thank you?

Smiled at them as they passed by only for them to look straight through you?

Have you ever worked in customer service?

Tell me you’ve never spurted out a naughty word, muttered something about karma or perhaps just even mentally put a bullet between someone’s eyes?

No?

I think you’re lying....

“Oh.”

Grandma looks at me expectantly, excitement spilling out of her big hazel eyes.

“Thanks Grandma,” I respond. I wasn’t expecting this. Since Grandma was diagnosed with dementia, Mum has been in charge of her presents, which usually means some cash and a hastily signed card.

It’s been years since I’ve had a physical present.

I couldn’t even tell you what the last one was.

In my hand ...

“I don’t understand,” he says blankly, spinning around in my chair.

I’ve kept my window open tonight, so X can see the stars. He likes to look at them from here, with his big big eyes. His shadow spins on the floor as he goes, four arms going round and round.

“I don’t either,” I reply and collapse into my covers.

“I thought you had to prove yourself as a mate? You proved yourself.”

“So did...

The Free People of England: An Alternative History

The rivalry between Scotland her southern neighbour is as infamous and as tedious as that of the rivalry between cats and dogs. Scotland has always had Englands head locked between her arms, as aggressive as any big sister could be. But this book seeks to imagine what life would have been like if the Scots had not successfully conquered England ...