“Don’t you dare call her. Not when we’re this close,” Daniel rips the phone out of my hand and shoves it into his bag. “Come on, Sasha, you know what needs to happen.”

“She has to know,” I stumble towards my phone, but Daniel’s glare holds me back.

“You’re not going to ruin this for us,” Daniel takes a step forward. “I’ve worked too damn hard, Sasha.”

“And what was the point of it all?” I seet...

“Maryann, I thought we said no more murdering at birthday parties,” my mom glares at me and I shrug. She sighs and returns to chopping carrots. “Frankly, it makes us look unprofessional.”

I roll my eyes and throw my scarlet-stained hands into the air. “Oh, come on. Shadowy alleyways are just so overrated. Like, yeah, we get it, you suck at your job. Broad daylight means you get a cooler scene.”

...

Gather round, wee lads

And I’ll tell you a tale

Of a man with some bagpipes

And the voice of a gale

Through tunnels and caves

He traveled the trails

A song in his throat

With the voice of a gale

On the cliffs of Clanyard Bay

In the breeze fairies sailed

Winds echoed of his music

Ah, the voice of a gale!

I’ll tell you now, lads

Pride is foolish and stale

This man heeded only him

And his voice o...

“Um, are you sure you’re God? You’re a lot shorter than I expected,” I glance over at the 9-year-old girl in the unicorn t-shirt sitting across from me. She slurps some strawberry milk and gestures for me to drink my coffee. I take a sip and try to swallow my disbelief.

“People call me lots of names,” she starts to count her stubby fingers, “Creator, Supreme Being, Deity, Idol. If you like the w...

The devil’s doormat choice was concerning, but even more troubling was the smile on his face.

“I got it from the local Hot Topic,” he beams at me, sitting down to trace the cursive Live, Laugh, Die on the doormat. Skulls and butterflies float around the words. “You know, it’s shocking, but sometimes humans actually make quality things. They really aren’t complete morons.”

I scoff and his cheeks...