My wife, and I were five weeks into our pregnancy, when she started spotting. At that time we lived just minutes from the hospital. We immediately went to the emergency room at the hospital for my wife to be seen. Like normal we got called back to the examination room and we told the doctor what was going on. He did his examination on her and he ordered for my wife to have an ultrasound done. After my wife got finished having the ultrasound done within the next hour we got news we didn’t want to hear. The doctor told both of us that he was sorry to have to inform us but it was a tubal pregnancy. When hearing those words we both were devastated. The doctor told us that my wife would need emergency surgery right away. On top of receiving bad news this was more then we could possibly take in one day. I don’t think I have ever cried as much in one day as I did that day. We were looking so forward to becoming parents and having little ones running around the house. My wife Carol ended up having emergency surgery that evening. I remember setting in the waiting room alone. All I remember doing was praying and asking God to let Carol make it though this.

I’ll never forget that day as long as I Live! If I told you it gets easier I'd be lying, it's minute to minute somedays and day to day on other days and then you have hr to hr days. You never get over it you just learn to deal and function the best you can. It's the worse kind of heartache that's for sure. I'm learning that accepting has to happen. 6 years later I still haven't, I'm struggling bad with it. Ive always learned to let it out rather hold it in. It will hit you at the most random times. I went to the restroom alone for a few mins to get my eye’s and face dried, serval times then right back at life it sucks it does. I'm praying for all those who may have to face the trials as my wife and I have already faced in the past six years. We are still believing that God will send us our little miracle.

.

Some say men don’t show emotions, but when Ricky was holding his baby for the first time he showed many emotions. Words weren’t needed and the smile on his little baby boy face lit the room up. It was as real as it gets. While Ricky was setting on the couch holding his little boy, he counted his fingers and toes. The newborn smell, expression, funny little noises and super soft skin. The look of love and pride on his face, shows how powerful love can be.

A daddy is one who stands strong and solid, seemingly invincible to the world and it’s many issues. Someone that nobody can break and who leads by example. Someone who has all the answers, or at least knows the direction and connection in order to solve problems. This describes Gaige’s daddy, Ricky. He died of a massive heart attack not long after Gaige was born. Ricky did get to spend a few months with his son before his death on August 16, 2017. Sadly, he never got to spend one birthday, or holiday with his baby boy. There’s a picture of his daddy that hangs in the hallway on the wall, and when my Aunt Julie goes to get Gaige for visitation and he see’s his daddy’s picture hanging on the wall, he points and says daddy! Hearing daddy coming from that sweet baby’s mouth is heartbreaking. Ricky only had a short time with his son, but the time he had it never went wasted. Ricky and Gaige’s love for one another was unconditional. Those of you who see and talk to your daddy, either today or just once in awhile....Cherish it because you have something more valuable than you know.