I loved soaking in your light.
I’d bask in it’s yellow glow.
But then I turned;
my ears at attention
and eyes no longer
fawn-hearted
the light became a prelude-
Screeching;
rubber on pavement.
I could only watch
My shadow illuminated on the tarmac
not by a sun
but captured
stone-still
by headlights....
August comes, and the wound passes.
Slow.
Thick and bitter, I choke it back.
I choke, I choke, I choke.
It suffocates;
I watch it settle.
Mesmerized, I watch you leave.
Tire tracks in the driveway
your coat still hangs on my door.
Ink on pages, I stain my fingers.
Scarlet on my hands
a book, discarded.
Cassiopeia, Ursa Major, Canis Minor.
Constellations the only witness
of my decay...
I am my father’s best soldier
and my mother’s most rotten daughter
Or;
I am my mother’s most righteous rage
and my father’s worst fear
A woman raised in carnage
to bring ruin
This house is not noble
and I will make it crumble
anyway.
I am no saint.
I am no martyr.
I am afraid.
I am my father’s best soldier
And I am my mother’s most righteous rage
I was not born for this;
And I will...
I’m sitting in this car
burning eyes tracking
The skinny girls
with their shiny legs
and shinier smiles
I stare
with eyebrows messier
than the blood pooling
beneath the skin of my knees
purple, yellow, green
hanging onto their conversations
by the skin of my teeth
They let me in
a door cracked open
Just far enough that my form
misshapen and awkward
can get through
They let me talk;
Trotting ...
I found a dog skull
in the woods
It was the skull of a dog
not some coyote or wolf or fox—
this i’m certain of.
It had man’s touch pressed into
it’s shortened snout
and loyalty smoothed
into it’s rounder shape
I wondered about the dog it was
before it was just a skull in the woods
before teeth marks made their jagged tattoos
in the crest of eye sockets
I stared at it’s moss-covered form
cente...
It is easy to get lost in the underworld.
These words
inscribed on the gates
the entrance to a garden that wants me
to stay
a labrynth
i’ve heard it called
the people I pass look stranger and stranger
don’t turn back.
don’t turn back.
the underworld is not so underworldy
it feels like—
don’t turn back.
don’t turn back.
she calls for me
i need to find her
they told me to go
they ...