Writing Prompt

He knew who you were but you held onto hope you were worth loving. Is he really missing or is he hiding? How many times will you stand to be abandoned? He isn’t missing and you know that but to run would be cowardly so he chose to disappear to you, everyone else playing the charade, your world isn’t real but maybe you will wake up someday from this dream; from this second life. People call you crazy but they don’t realize that when you dream, you’re waking up to a different life. Is this actually the dream? How to you decipher these two worlds?

deserves better. I’ll explain, he doesn’t know about my life he doesn’t deserve to get involved, i love him but never fully showed it for his sake. I was 7 when my mom was having her second baby, my little sister gracie. it was a home birth, they pulled my father out of the room where my mothers screamed, i sat around the corner waiting. i heard them gravely say only one would survive. My father gasped and calmly said; her. I remember beginning to shake as my face flooded with the tears that ripped my face. after a few minutes the screaming stopped and i heard “cornelia, cornelia. time of death 12:19 pm”. This was the last memory i had of my mom alive and i held onto it. It was on my mind all the time, i began to realize and blame. The first time i blames my dad- he killed my mom, i didn’t want a little sister anyway she stole my attention and cried nonstop, i didn’t want her. Angry, i decided i was going to confront my dad. My dad got home from his job at the barbershop at 7:16 pm. Awaiting him, i sat on a chair next to the front door; it was 7:19, and my impatient 7 year old self grew antsy. finally i heard a door slam shut and the door knob jangle-it was interrupted by another slammed door and the loud muffled bass from a car stereo, the door shook harder and faster, i heard a deep voice scream hey as the door opened revealing my dad who had been shot in the back by the deep voiced man. i sat there crying holding my lifeless dad in my arms for hours until police showed up, i was given to live with my dads brother who explained when i was a little older why my dad had been shot. it turns out my dad and his brother were apart of a gang and my dad was killed because he wanted out “for his kids” my uncle told me. Growing up my uncle wasn’t home often and just more of a friend than a guardian. by the time i was 12 my uncle was hugh up in the ranks of the gang which meant he was a higher target. Constantly having to be on the run and hide and be in dangerous situations was very stressful; but i knew Gracie was my number one priority. So when he came along, another person i loved a didnt want to lose or endanger like my mom or Gracie, so skeptical of gangs watching me and finding things out i never showed him i cared that much but i do. Someday i hope i can tell him, I could move to mexico with Gracie and him and there we could live happily ever after in a safe environment. Then i could show him i really am in love with him.

He’s gone and he will never come back again. He knew what I was. I had to get rid of him. I miss him yes, but he won’t be coming back ever again.