I grew up in an environment

Where healing wasn’t normalised.

All I ever saw was prayers, tears

And great sacrifice.

All that made me who I am

But there’s so much more.

I didn’t understand it

Until I reached out to the child I was before.

Some say God is enough

But real ones know he can’t do all the work.

I have to look deep inside

And find what needs evaluation.

Heal the parts of me that thrive from validation

Quiet the monsters who

Try to determine my strides.

Love on the parts of me

That think it would be easier to hide.

The child in me screams for acceptance

Something I didn’t feel much as a youth.

Adult me hates rejection

Child me and adult me

Only got by with mothers protection.

Her prayers for my evolution

That I would fulfill my purpose

And grow up and define my path

In this metaphorical circus.

I open the page

And say hello

To the timid girl before.

I write to her

Telling her that she is loved.

I revisit the stories

That she holds so dearly

Trauma no longer lodged in the shadows

But uncovered

And analysed clearly.

A new woman

Here to stay

With the child within still crying out for acknowledgment.

The woman,

A constant living example

Of what once was

And what is to be.