I am writing to you to tell you that... well I’m not entirely sure yet but hopefully as I continue to write, the right words will flow from my brain to my fingers and then on to this piece of paper.

I just wanted to talk about us. When you left I didn’t know what to feel. Upset. Happy. Angry. I literally felt nothing or it was that I felt so many things that I couldn’t decide what one to show you.

I wanted to apologise for the way I acted when we were all saying goodbye. Or in my case the way I didn’t act. I should’ve been there for you and supported your decision to fly half way around the world for what... 3 years? Anyway, you were my best friend. I mean you are my best friend, I should’ve been happy for you and i was but I just didn’t know how to show you that without allowing my other emotions to flood out with that one.

I’m so sorry that I didn’t give you a proper goodbye. But as you know I have never been good at displaying emotion. Some people think it’s because I’ve never had someone to show to too and some people just think I’m dead inside. But you know the real reason. And you chose to love that side of me and let me be me. That’s why you are my best friend, you accepted my worst trait and I have never actually shown you or told you how much I appreciate that every single day of my life.

When we are together, I am never afraid to be just me. Even though I can’t express any emotion I still love you more than anything. And I wish I could tell you that and actually showing you that I mean those words. I love you. So so much. And I never want to lose you.

Well that’s literally it. I just wanted to tell you that. Oh an one more thing... I am so happy for you even though that I might not have shown it before you left I really am happy for you and so so proud of what you have become. You are moving on with your life and it is only mature of me to do the same. So as of today, I am applying for that job at MI6. Just what you wanted. And I hope this shows you how much I appreciate your friendship and care about you.

So now I going to say goodbye. I love you more than anything else in this world and I am so unbelievably proud of you. And I am going to miss you more than you’ll ever know but I’ll see you soon. Enjoy your new life.

Goodbye x

Best regards

Your best friend