I found my parents old love letters. Lets look through them mkay?

The first one reads “i love you frank! From charlie.”

Then franks all like “i love you charlie! From frank.”

Wow it really seems like they love each other. I should go now.

Wait whats this little slip of paper peeping from under the stack. Its another note!

“Dear frank, i have a terrible secret to share with you. I am a vampire! From charlie.”

“Dear charlie, im cool with that. Its actually kind of hot. You can eat up my blood all you want, sugar monster. From frank.”

“Aw thanks man. But I’m really hungry. If i suck all your blood at once you’ll die!”

“Then we can have children and you can suck their blood while they sleep.”

OH MY GOOODNESS WHAT!!!!!!

The acne on my neck… are actually vampire bites?? Egads! This complicates my typical view of love!