I jolted away, gasping, as soon as I saw it. “I can’t-“ I broke off, my heart beating wildly. My eyes were wide as they flickered around the room - except at him, I couldn’t look at him - and I knew I looked like a wild animal, trapped in a corner. “I can’t take that.”

It was irrational, I knew, to be so afraid of that one little object. But his gift scared me in so many different ways.

I backed up, tripping over my own feet as I turned away. I had to go I had to get away I couldn't breathe I was drowning. My heart beat so loudly, it was all I could hear, thump thump thump. There was a ringing too though, my ears were ringing I couldn't hear I had to get away.

The last thing I saw before I darted out the door were his eyes, surprised and hurt.

- - -

Two days passed, and I spent every moment dreading when I had to face him. Surprisingly, he let me stay away. I would leave the room every time I saw him enter, and he never followed me. I knew that if he really wanted to talk to me, he could, whether I liked it or not.

But for whatever reason, he was giving me the space I needed. And it killed me.

Every second I didn’t talk to him made me realize what was becoming too difficult to deny. I needed him. And as much as I worried, I knew he needed me too.

I wanted to talk to him, to tell him everything I was feeling, but his words rang through my head.

“I love you.”

I loved him too, I really loved him. But I was so scared, how could we ever work? We would be like a firework, exploding in brilliant light, but then fading away just as quickly.

“I swear I won’t ever leave you.”

I know, I know he would never. It was me who I worried about, I would have to leave him, I would have to go, it would break us both. I couldn’t do that.

“I want it to be you.”

I could still feel the dread, coursing through my veins. Because I had known what it would be that he brought out, I had known but wouldn’t believe it until it was right in front of my face.

“Will you accept?”

But I couldn’t accept what he offered. I wanted to, but I just couldn’t. I would hurt him, I would hurt me, and I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t I couldn’t I couldn’t.

I had done enough damage to his life.

I wouldn’t do any more.

Ever since he met me, his life has been wrecked. I ruined so much. He was stupid to love me, and I was selfish to let him.

I knew what I had to do.

Y’all are probably so annoyed I never told you what it was😂😂

Or who it was…

…or what the hecks even happening…

Does this even count…?🤣