It started with family

It began with friends

Born was a cycle

That will never end

Too hurt to cry

Body be numb

How else will they love

Unless I am dumb

Be blonde and brunette

600 calories a day

Maybe if I was skinny

They would like me more that way

Kiss too many to count

Let so many in

Make my lock easy to pick

Easily stabbed like a pin

Claw without a scratch

Draw blood but don’t bleed

One’s that love, I hate they stay

But I want the ones who leave

Look for validation

Crave it 24/7

Will I ever have more

Than 7 minutes in heaven

I am scared they’ll see

The scars that were left

Push away the ones who care

Felt so alone I wept

What do I want

Do I know this girl

Alone she’s wandered

Alone in this world

For they won’t see

They hear but don’t listen

Like fool’s gold

My attention does glisten

They say not my circus

They state not my monkeys

But if I don’t have a story

Is there much more of me

I ruin all that’s good

Familiar with the pain

I’m scared if I heal

Will I bore the next day

For they don’t really care

Do and say so I must

But if I don’t trust myself

Who’s [there] left to trust