Zina’s eyes widened at the large glass buildings which were glistening from the sun.

“Am I- Am I really going to be living here?”

Her mom, who was right beside her grabbed her hand. “Yes, and you are going to love it here.”

“I’m nervous, I mean, am I really good enough to live in a place like this? Everyone who got in here are probably top students who have won millions of awards. I’ve barely won any.” Zina replied, anxiously backing away from the campus.

This place was just so…glamorous. It looked like a place where many people left behind footprints or made permanent marks. That was something that Zina had never had the opportunity to do before, having lived in a one bedroom apartment halfway across the world half her life, with her two stubborn older brothers who never gave her any space.

“Zina,” her mom bent down to her eye level “Listen, hon. You got in to this school for a reason. You didn’t get in a car crash or run out of gas on the way here. So you are meant to be here. They chose you because you are somebody. So no more of this ‘Ohhh I’m not good enough’ whiny business. Get your bags from the car, and let’s go.”

Zina blinked. She knew her mom was a tough cookie, but this was college she was talking about. How could she just… stop being nervous?Her Mom usually got soft when Zina opened up to her about uneasy feelings. Not today though. She wondered if it was because her mom was trying to toughen up herself, in preparation to leave her eldest daughter here. Zina knew that it would be hard for her.

“Zeeeeeeeeeena! Hurry!!! I wanna wide the ewevator!” Iya, Zina’s three year old sister whined, snapping Zina back to the moment.

“All right.” Zina trudged towards the car, grabbed her heavy suitcase and dragged it along as her Mom chased a speedy Iya as she ran across the gleaming sidewalks.

Everything was too bright. Zina’s head felt woozy. Something was really off about this place. There was a feeling of dread in the pit of her stomach, the feeling she used to get when she would open her eyes to a morning sky on a huge exam day.

Oh Iya. Zina studied her as she raced far ahead.

She was only three. She was born when her mom got remarried a few years ago and Zina left her brothers to come stay with her mom and absent stepdad.

Would Iya miss her? Would she forget about Zina? Iya was practically Zina’s only best friend at home. She could lift anyone’s mood by just tilting her head and smiling. She was that dilusional.

Zina was already missing home, thinking about Iya’s smile. She missed her dark, cold, tiny room. And she hadn’t even seen her dorm yet.

Once the three of them located Building A, Iya ran to the elevator and giggled as she jammed the button.

“YAYY!” She cried when the doors slid open.

No one, and I mean, no one, was as fascinated by elevators as Iya.

“You know your roommate, right?” Her mom asked.

“I know her, but I don’t know her name. She wanted to tell me in person. Kind of mysterious.” Zina replied, dragging her luggage through the elevator doors.

Hee mom blinked in surprise “Oh, well alright. Does she know yours?”

Zina shook her head. She had felt embarrassed sharing her name if the other girl wouldn’t. They had both agreed to meet in person and give introductions.

Iya clapped her hands “There’s so many doors!” she squealed. Then she gave Zina a skeptical look “Don’t get lost ZeeZee! Don’t open the door for strangers!” She said, grinning.

“Maybe you should stay here with me, to make sure I follow the rules.” Zina said truthfully.

Iya’s voice got quiet. “Mommy says no.”

Her eyes filled with tears.

Zina panicked. Her heart dropped. She hated upsetting Iya.

“Hey, it’s okay Iya! I’ll be back, I promise.” she forced cheerfully.

Zina’s mom, who had been daydreaming, snapped back to life when she heard Iya cry.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m going to miss Zina, she’s going to be alone.”

“Oh Iya, it’s okay to feel sad, it’s hard to see Zina leave.” hee mom soothed.

Zina’s heart felt wrenched. She had upset Iya. If only the three of them had never left their apartment.

“Next time I see you, will you bring me art?” Zina asked, hoping to bring Iya’s smile back.

Iya wiped her eyes “Yes.”

“All right, come. Let’s see Zina’s room.” Her mom took Iya’s hand and guided her towards room A256.

Zina blinked back tears. She hated this. All of it was too much. Leaving her brothers was sad, but leaving Iya brought a heartache that caused her to want everything to just stop.

Zina took a deep breath as Iya eagerly jammed the key in Zina’s door, and twisted.

The door creaked when it opened, and Zina saw shoes on the floor.

_My roommate is here. _She thought. _Here goes nothing…_

“Hello?” Zina yelled into the room_._

“In here!” A voice responded. She heard shuffling, and then there she was_. _

She saw the freckles first. Then she saw the smoke drifting from her lips.

Zina’s face blanched.

_No. It can’t be. It’s not her._

_“_Wait_… Zina?”_

_Crud. Oh crud. No. No._

The dusty ground suddenly felt uneven as Iya slipped past all of them and ran towards the bedrooms.

“Zina, why are you…?”

This was not good. Zina’s breath quickened. Zina’s mom spoke up in a shaking voice. Because, she knew this girl just as well as Zina did. “This is Zina’s room.”

The girl took a deep breath “Oh, my god. No way. We’re roommates, Zina.”

Zina dropped the box full of glasses and plates she had promised not to drop. Her mom flinched like a baby rabbit.

__

_How???_

_How did she even get into this place?_

__

__

A few minutes ago, everything sucked.

Now, everything was was a never ending nightmare.__

__

So she ran.

The wind slapped her face. She _ran_.

Because that girl.

Zina loved her once.

She was beautiful, like her name, Harlen.

She was the kind of beautiful that when you see her, you instantly feel okay again. You feel… hopeful.

When her Dad returned after four years, beginning of their junior year, they had both been on their guard. Harlen, guarding her family. Zina, guarding her.

They were pulling it off.

Until Emma Kardasky accused Harlen of sexual harassment, and Harlen was dropped from the volleyball team.

She _loved _volleyball.

And apparently, she loved it more than herself. More than Zina. Because when her dad offered her heroin to help her deal, she said yes.

She never looked back. Zina was left on the streets, screaming.

The end!

Sincerely,

Caralia🫶🏼

This has been in my drafts for forever! Tell me what you guys think, I don’t write many stories so it’s probably not the best… hope you enjoyed though. I’m open to feedback!