It’s hard to be inconspicuous when you’re hanging upside down.

I watched their wicked faces contort with laughter. Some of them were doubled over in tears. I tried fruitlessly to pull myself upright. This was supposed to be a private practice. I was gonna show them…

But no, of course not. How could I believe that I, the anemic girl who could only afford wash her hair and clothes once a week, would ever be seen as an equal?

I bit back my tears. I wanted to be strong. I wanted to prove them wrong. I had snuck into the school gym every night this week, spending three hours trying to pull myself to the top of the rope. I’d been so proud of myself today for finally making it past the first knot.

“That’s the best you can do?”** **I heard Katie’s voice below me. I whipped my head down. She was smirking, one hand on the chair I had used to boost myself up to the rope.

“No, please, don’t.” I begged. I had been afraid of heights my whole life and Katie knew that. We had been best friends until middle school, when she began hanging out with the wealthier kids and left me behind.

Katie laughed and dragged the chair to the dark corner of the gym, completely out of reach. I tried to slow my panicked breathing.

“You got up, you can make it back down.” I repeated over and over in my mind.

Suddenly, I heard a cacophony of laughing voices coming towards the gym door.

Katie walked back towards me. I made eye contact with her as she neared the rope. There was a cruelty and contempt in her eyes - gone was the empathetic girl I used to know. I had turned from her tribe mate to her prey.

She grabbed ahold of the bottom of the rope and swung it back and forth, violently. I lost my grip and my head swung towards the ground. I barely hung on, my thighs squeezing the rope for dear life.

Katy let go of the rope as the gym door banged open. The rest of her friends crowded the gym. As soon as they saw me, it was open season.

The laughter was deafening. One of them pulled out their phone and took pictures of me.

“Nice one, Katie!” yelled Nick, the short brunette who never stopped bragging about his dad’s successful tech startup. Katie curtsied and skipped back over.

There was nowhere to hide, I was completely stuck there, a deer caught in the headlights. I didn’t have the strength to pull myself up, and if I let go, I’d fall and hit my head. I closed my eyes and tuned them out until their voices were a dull roar, hoping they would get bored and leave soon.

But it was never-ending and eventually, my thighs started to slide down the rope. My feet and hands were going numb and my legs were shaking. I tried one last Hail Mary.

“HELP! HELP!!” I screamed as loud as I could. Their faces changed.

“Shut up!” yelled the big, dumb muscle of the group, Ken. But I didn’t.

“HEELLLPPPP!” I yelled louder.

He started towards me, but Nick held him back.

“Dude we better go. We can’t get caught. My dad will kill me if I get expelled.”

That gave me some confidence. I screamed louder and louder, using all of my energy.

“HELLLPPP! HELPPPPP! HEEEEELLLLPPPP!!!”

They all jumped at the sound of loud feet storming down the hall, and bolted through the emergency exit door. I let out a shaky sigh of relief, and finally let myself cry.

The door slammed open. It was Coach Carr, my PE teacher and coach of the girl’s varsity soccer team. He quickly ran over to me.

“Let go, I’ll catch you.” He said calmly.

“No no no no, I can’t move. I can’t move.” I panicked. I could still see how far the ground was below me.

“You can do it. Take a deep breath.” He said, encouragingly.

My left thigh began to slip lower. I clamped onto the rope tighter, my whole body shaking and burning, and took a deep breath.

I felt the relief of his arms a moment later, realizing I had done it. I had jumped.

“Nice one, Syd!” He said with an enthusiasm I hadn’t heard before. He gently laid me down on the ground.

“Don’t get up yet. You’ll get dizzy.” He sat cross-legged next to me and we waited in silence for a minute.

“I should probably suspend you for sneaking in here.” He said. I looked over in panic, ready to plead, but he continued,

“But I’m proud of you, Syd. You’re a good kid. Next time, just ask for help if you need it. Before you end up slipping off a rope 10 feet off the ground.” he added with a mock scolding tone.

“Thanks Coach.” I said quietly. It was the first time anyone had told me they were proud of me.

“Now let’s get you home.” He offered me his hand and pulled me up. He held my shoulders while I steadied myself, and we slowly made our way out of the school, where I had gone in feeling like a loser, and left feeling hopeful. All things considered, that night was a win.