04/02/25

Today I woke up and I decided I was going to be a better person than yesterday.

So I got out of bed, put on clothes, and left the house.

I carried a bag of food with me, and walked to the nearest food shelter to donate it.

I collected some old toys and clothes and gave them to a local charity shop.

I gave 10% of my earnings this month to 3 lesser charities.

But yet I fall asleep with the same feeling as yesterday.

08/02/25

Today I woke up and decided I would be better to the people closest to me.

So I went to the florist and bought flowers for my girlfriend. I love her more than anything and she loves me, ‘No matter my faults,’ but I shan’t exclude her.

I gifted her the flowers and got the bus to my parents house.

I cooked lunch for them and we ate it in the conservatory like we used to many years ago.

I sent a message to my sister telling her I would send a gift to her house.

But yet I fall asleep with the same feeling as yesterday.

13/02/25

Today I woke up and decided I would try to be better to the people I pass on the street and in shops.

So when I passed people on the street I said, ‘Excuse me,’ and, ‘Sorry,’ with a smile plastered onto my face.

When I bought my groceries I made small talk with the cashier and thanked her.

I smiled at the people I saw in the street.

But yet I fall asleep with the same feeling as yesterday.

26/02/25

Today I woke up and realised I don’t care about anyone but my girlfriend.

So we went out for a fancy breakfast, then to the casino.

With our earnings we went out to get some food which we brought to my house to eat.

We had our dinner before making our way to the nightclub where we spent the larger part of our teenage years.

And I fall asleep with a slightly different feeling from yesterday.

18/03/25

Today I woke up in the middle of the night, by a phone call.

When I answered I was told my girlfriend was in the hospital.

And likely wouldn’t make it out.

22/03/25

Today I woke up in a chair stuck unceremoniously in the corner of the room.

I stared at my still sleeping girlfriend, tuning out the beeps of the heart monitor.

The smell of death and antiseptic find their way up my nose.

I fall asleep with an agony so potent I fear I’m going to burst.

28/03/25

Today I woke up.

But she didn’t.

They convinced me to go home. And I don’t know why I listened.

Shes gone because of me.

The hospital staff told me they were sorry. They did everything they could.

Screw them.

31/03/25

Today the hospital went up in flames.

Yesterday the doctor surgery.

Tomorrow the town.

I heard the people scream as they tried to escape.

But if they couldn’t save my girlfriend.

Why should I save them?

I fall asleep with a sense of fulfilment.