bright white lights

strange sounds come from your mouth

your eyes beg me to understand

your face looks like a distant memory

like the parking lot at the beach

understanding just beyond reach

reason floating through the door

my breathing is slow

colors i’ve never seen before

shift swiftly in the corner of my vision

bright white lights

it all hurts my eyes its blinding

i feel the pain in my throat it’s burning

i get scared that i might know what it is before i even look

like when i ate candy just before the dentist

so he would be disgusted by my sticky teeth

i put on my mood ring

and the colors all swirled

room temperature mood soup

i feel sick because they want to change me

and i agree

i think i’m all bad

i think there’s nothing good

i think i need to change

but i just keep being the same

and no matter how far i disassociate

no matter how far i float into that empty space

i’m still there with me