[Reads like a rap]

I’ve gone through so many trials and pains

Of wanting to be somewhere I am not

I thought it loss, instead it’s gain,

Now I’m content with what I’ve got.

I don’t chase after love,

It brings false hope

I don’t brood in the shadows

Where I can fall prone to

The darkness

And the empty

That I felt so long ago.

For being unloved, I thought,

Was all I’d ever know.

But I was wrong

So wrong,

I don’t need a woman

To love and to love me.

Not now, and maybe not ever.

I never thought that maybe

Chasing after those pipe dreams

Was what was killing me.

I got struck down and got up again

Time and time again

And for what?

To be broken again and again?

They say the definition of insanity

Is doing something over and over again

Expecting a different outcome,

A different possibility.

And yes, I do admit, I am insane

When I don’t think with my head

And my heart runs away.

It’s the first to feel the aftershock,

The breaking, the pain,

The noiseless dying

Of something inside of me.

I’ve felt it too much.

I once thought that my only purpose

Was to get married, start a family,

Work hard to bring bread to the table

As soon as I was able,

And confident, and ready.

Maybe that’s not how it’s supposed to be,

Not yet anyway.

So I started searching for a way

To fix all my problems

And people kept telling me

Only contentment will solve ‘em.

And contentment in God,

Not in anyone else,

You gotta trust in Him

Instead of yourself.

But I didn’t listen,

No I didn’t even bother,

Got hit with heartache and sorrow

One right after another.

And I got knocked down so hard

I fell for miles and miles

Till I couldn’t find a way out

And I couldn’t even smile.

And the worst cut of all

Was what I did to myself,

I stayed deep in depression

And never asked for help.

So I wallowed there months and months,

Deep in my sin.

This was because of my heart,

Because I didn’t trust Him

To save me from all this

Heartache and pain.

I knew I should have just listened

When my parents explained:

“Son you gotta get a job to live your life

“You gotta trust in God,

“Then He’ll give you a wife.

“You may be twenty or thirty

“Before you ever find her,

“But right now, focus on the road, son,

“Put on your blinders.

“Keep away from temptation

“And turn away from sin,

“The only way you’ll be content’s

“If you trust in Him.”

So I took their advice

And went out and got a job,

I readjusted my focus

And started trusting in God,

I know it ain’t easy,

It never really is,

Because we’re all sinners,

We gotta fight our sin.

Not in our own strength,

But in Christ alone.

If we look to His example,

He’ll bring us all home.

And now it’s safe to say that

I’m content where I am.

Single.