TW: Emotional abuse/Emotionally Unavailable Parent

I wait in silence

For her mouth to stop opening

For her face to be calmer

For her foul-smelling breath to stop traveling into my face

I sit in silence

Hope she’ll stop yelling soon

Hope I can unfreeze

Hope my ears stop ringing

**_Ow._**

You just had to hurt me

Stab me where I actually feel the pain

Twist it in my back

& pull it out, only to replace the pain w/ more excruciating pain

Ofc

None of this is physical

It’s all in my head,

But jeez it hurts.

I raise my head, eyes dripping

Water spilling out onto my cheeks,

Down my nose, off my chin

I am a mess

_You don’t know the first thing abt pain._

Oh, really?

Like hell I don’t.

I’ve been in this situation for more times than I can count

I always leave it crying bc only you can make the waterworks turn on

Only you can hurt me this much

But that doesn’t matter, does it?

Do you remember me,

Crying on my bedroom floor

In the dark

The door shut

Pitch black

Sobbing against my bed

Hating me hating you

Wishing one of us weren’t here?

Do you remember me,

Never listening to you

You never listened to me

when I told you I had anxiety

You believed me, so you said

Do you remember me?

Insisting I had ADHD,

Welp, turns out I have ADD

Guess the hyperactive part doesn’t apply to constant fidgeting

But I was right.

Do you remember me?

Bc I remember you.

& I wish I were invisible to that version of you.