Buildings around me are burning

and Russians are arming nukes

while the Saudis gun up

to face off against Chinese troops.

And the battles rage on

in Europe and the Middle East,

I’m standing on the shores of Normandy

and I remember I left the kettle on.

Under shelling and heavy fire,

I’m thinking about the dirty dishes,

and wondering if I burnt the roast

when they came to force the draft.

My wife seemed very distressed

but I figure it’ll turn out fine

as long as someone mows the lawn

and sends out the bills on time.

Here I take a stand for liberty

realizing that my car

is unlocked currently,

and I forgot to fill out the paperwork

to extend its warranty.