I HATED HIM. I do, but I was walking with him when this whole creepy, surreal thing started. Of course. Of course I _had_ to be with _him_ and _he had_ to be all like, “I just wanted to make sure you were okay.” And then the whole vulnerable thing where’s he like, “My mom died too.” _AS IF. _You know what? It’s probably better if I just start from the beginning.

It had been a long year. Well, two long years. But this one in particular my mom’s illness had taken a dive. A deep one. She’d been bedridden for over half the year, almost nine months. Money was getting tighter, and I had offered to get a job to help cover some of the expenses that would take care of me and my little sister, Carrie. My father felt guilty about it, I could tell, but he allowed me to help out. He knew we needed the help more than his pride. And I loved him dearly for that.

I found this great part time job as a secretary for a fitness center. The nice lady that hired me was so kind and told me there was one other secretary I would be working with who everyone adored. I was very optimistic about that and excited about making a friend at my new job. On my first day I was nervous. I hadn’t had a job in a good, well, nine months. I had quit my last one to help take care of my mom when she wasn’t at the hospital. But dad agreed Carrie was a litter older, fourteen now and could start helping out a bit with mom. I walked through the doors with a smile, ready to be trained and get started. To my surprise, I found some boy messing around behind the front desk.

“Are you supposed to be back there?”

I had asked. He had then turned to me and I’ll admit, I was taken aback when I saw how handsome he was. His smile, I’d thought, could be a warrent for arrest. It probably helped him get away with so much trouble. He had brilliant blue eyes, and really, what girl doesn’t love blue eyes? His hair was dark and styled as if he had just woken up.

“And who are you to ask questions?”

His charms became immediately ineffective.

“Exuse me, I happen to work here.” I said, conveniently leaving out that this was my first day. His smile turned taunting.

“Oh, so _you’re _the new hire. I thought they said you were sweet.”

I scowled.

“You work here?”

He had ignored my question.

“Hey I thought you had to be a least seventeen to work here. Did they lower the hiring age?”

I bristled.

“I’m eighteen.”

He bit his lip.

“You sure? Because I’m almost positive I sensed a pouty foot stomp in your expression.”

“Whatever. Can you just help me find the hiring manager? She had promised to introduce me to the other secretary.”

His eyes glittered with mischief.

“Please?”

I had jabbed my fingers into my palm to keep from saying something snarky back and with a deep breath and much reluctance I added,

“_Please_.”

His grin widen.

“Much better. And I can do you one better, I’m the only other secretary here. It’s a pleasure to meet you, I’m Rykland, my friends call my Ryk. You are?”

He laughed and I’m sure it had been at my shocked expression. _He _was the other secretary? Him? The one everyone supposedly adored? I’d met him two minutes and I already hated him. Why is it always the pretty boys that were the disrespectful nuisances? After I’d composed myself I’d finally responded.

“Well, _Rykland, _the_ pleasure _is all mine,”

I’d said sarcastically.

“My name is Ruby. My friends call me Rue. So you may call me Ruby.”

He chuckled at that and I’d frowned.

“Well then, _Ruby, _if you’re done mistrusting my employedness, would you like to get started? They asked me to train you.”

_Of course they had. _

I had soon found it was easier to not say much as that fed his fire and desire to ruthlessly make fun of me. That first day after that initial conversation I’d tried much harder to be civil and I’d gotten trained without much trouble. As the days had went by, I’d settled into the routine of arriving at work, giving back a half answer to Rykland’s over enthusiastic greeting. Then sitting next to him for the next five hours combating witty remarks, funny looks, smiles, and, his worst offense, insincere compliments. They made me blush and I did not want to be blushing around Rykland. It gave him too much power.

Days turned into weeks, and weeks into three months. I was much more stressed these days. School was coming to a close and finals were coming up. Junior year had been tough. Thankfully, as the weather improved, foot traffic at the center had increased quite a bit and Rykland and I were busy enough that his attempts to frustrate me lessened. We helped the lifeguards keep the levels in the outdoor pool where they should be, helped sub basketball practices and dance classes, cleaned weight machines as well as the desk job of checking people in. My mother, was in the hospital full time now. The last several treatments had yielded no results. Home felt empty, and family dinners were quiet. My sister Carrie had never been the quiet type, but now I could hardly drag a conversation out of her. That worried me. And dad, I swore I could see his hair graying if he stood still enough. Like life was crushing him in between her cruel hands. Aging the man that used to be full of light and carefree joy.

One day was particularly crushing. My mother was on her latest treatment and was dealing with some nasty side effects. My dad, sister, and I were having our usual Saturday morning breakfast when dad got a call. The hospital had said that mother needed him and that they were to make some big decisions. I watched as my father seemed to age yet another year as he finished the call. He had apologized and rushed out the door leaving my sister and I shocked at the table.

I had work that day so I drove Carrie to a friends house to stay while I was gone. When I came in I was practically shaking with anxiety. Rykland was there with his usual greeting and I didn’t even have the energy to give a half answer. I sat down and got straight to work avoiding even looking at him. I was so distracted that it wasn’t even all that hard. Luckily, Rykland, for once in his life, read the room and didn’t push me. It was around lunch when I got a call. From my dad this time.

I had stepped out of the fitness center to answer.

My dads voice was tight with emotion as I answered the call. He explained that the treatment wasn’t working. Another dead end. I was numb as he broke the news that mom was coming home. She was being put on hospice care. She would die.

The next several moment were a blur. I remember them of out of order. Promising my dad I wouldn’t drive while I took this in. Running away from the fitness center. Crying my heart dry. I faintly remember my name being called as I ran, but I couldn’t stop, I couldn’t breathe. All I knew was I needed to get away from myself. My life, everything. But I couldn’t run fast enough.

When I did stop running my eyes were dry, and I was lost. I was in an unfamiliar part of town and I started reprimanding myself for being so stupid as to get myself lost. I had sat on a nearby card board box deflated. Then I’d heard my name again. Was that…_Rykland_?

Sure enough, Rykland came around the corner panting and drenched in sweat. I was sure I didn’t look all that great and for some stupid, traitorous reason that made me blush. I hoped it looked like I was flush from running. I didn’t realize, however, that I was very cold until I saw my jacket in his hands. I shivered.

“What are you doing here, Rykland?”

I had snapped. I shouldn’t have, but I felt like lashing out. Which wasn’t a good excuse.

He had gently handed me my jacket and after I just stared at it, helped me put it on.

“You’re hands are like ice.” He said holding them.

I watched his eyes as warmth spread from my finger tips to my chest.

“You didn’t answer my question.” I pointed out, pulling my hands away and stuffing them in my pockets.

He sighed. “You forgot your jacket when you ran away, and you looked so upset when you left, I just…”

He paused, looking into my eyes for a long moment seeming to try and figure out a puzzle that was missing a few pieces.

“Wanted to make sure you were okay.”

I had snorted at that.

“Yep I’m all fine, never been better actually.”

I expected a smile, or at least an eye roll, something similar to how he usually responded to my sarcasm. But instead he frowned.

“Will you walk with me?” He said it so tenderly,

A ‘yes’ was out of my mouth before I could think to form words. He had held out a hand to help me off the box but didn’t hold on to it which left me disappointed for some reason. Then, a stab of guilt for that feeling. I shouldn’t be thinking of anything other than about my mom. They’d given up treatments. A heavy sadness settled over my shoulders at that thought as we started to walk. Rykland was very quiet. That was unusual for him. Anger suddenly flared in my gut. I hated how everyone in my life was so quiet now.

“Is Lana going to fire me now?” I’d said bitterly and perhaps a little harsher than I’d intended.

“No.” He said. More silence and then,

“Do you want to talk about it Ruby?”

I thought about it. Maybe if I told him he’d stop acting towards me the way he’d been. He’d be scared off by the girl who’s life is falling apart at the seams. And maybe just maybe, I did want to talk about it.

“My mother was put on hospice today.”

His eyes widened and he cursed under his breath.

“Crap. Rue, why didn’t you tell me?”

I turned to look at him noticing the change in his regaurd concerning my name. He looked genuinely hurt.

I shrugged.

He ran a hand through his hair.

“I’m sorry, Rue.”

I nodded because what else was I supposed to say? It wasn’t okay.

We walked for a while before he spoke again.

“My mother died too.”

He said it so causally I was furious for some reason. Like I’d said I was going grocery shopping this weekend and he’d said he was going shopping too. I was surprisingly hurt that he would so flippantly try to relate to me I turned to snap until I saw his eyes. And the pain there. Instead of snapping the next words out of my mouth we’re

“How? When?”

He smiled sadly.

“Car crash. I was ten.”

I swallowed. The idea of not even being able to prepare weighed heavy on my heart.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It is now. But it took awhile.”

He gave me a look that made me feel understood, and supported and the same time made me weak and feel like melting into him. Something shifted, friendship I think. We fell once more into silence. The sun was going down, street lights coming on, when I started to notice the cardboard boxes.

_Everywhere._