he always overthought the idea of me getting pregnant.

every time we would have sex, hes never pulled out. not once.

i can see why it would freak him out, but ive had an IUD since i was 14, and im 18 now.

i still have a year and a half left. it should be working.

a year of unprotected sex almost every day with the same person without a second thought, you dont think it can happen to you. until it does.

the symptoms came slowly. i didnt get my period, but that was nothing out of the ordinary. my IUD makes them irregular.

i started getting sick every morning, but i thought it was just the anxiety of having yo go to school. i never liked school.

he told me to take a test, i refused because i didnt want to face the fact that it could actually be happening.

what would i tell my parents? how could i go to school like this? i still have at least 4 years of college ahead of me!

i was terrified. but together, we went to the walgreens down the street from my house. we had to steal the test, which is just even more proof that we arent ready to be parents.

would he even stay? a million thoughts rushed through my mind as i squatted over a plastic stick right in front of my high school boyfriend. a position i never thought i would be in.

my crippling phobia of vomit doesnt help the situation, either. how would i take care of a sick child when i freak out if my boyfriend even mentions the word vomit.

nothing about this situation was okay.

we stared at the first line, anticipating the second.

i didnt think it would actually show up, but there it was, a positive pregnancy test. right in front of my face.

my mind raced, tears rushed out of my eyes as if they were running from something.

he looked at me, terrified. “im right here. im not going anywhere. i promise.” he said as he held my lifeless body.

i felt like a corpse. but with another living thing inside of me.

the symptoms progressed over the next few months, and i still hadnt told my parents. what if they kicked me out? every possibility you could possibly imagine flooded my mind.

it was all i thought about. 5 months in, it was time to come clean to my mom.

tears filled my eyes as i handed her the positive test that i had been keeping in my underwear drawer this whole time.

just like my boyfriend did, she held me. she was disappointed, but hid it very well. i knew she wanted to support me.

the pregnancy was hard. but he was there for me through it all. satisfying every weird craving, holding my hair each morning before leaving me at home to go to work, as present as a father can be.

then, it was time. one random night laying in bed watching netflix together, i felt it. my first contraction.

not knowing what it was, i panicked and jumped out of bed. then my water broke.

reality hit us like a brick as he was almost carrying me to the car.

we were really going to be parents. it was the beginning of the rest of our lives.