I kissed him, did I mean to? I don’t know.

He passionately kissed me, and I was looking for a way out.

“Marie!” My bestfriend shouted.

_Shoot_. “Coming,” I say.

“I promise it’s not what it looks like.”

“You kissed him because you missed jase?”

“Yes…. When you put it that way.. but I didn’t mean to.”

“Come here,” She said, opening her arms wide for a hug. I hugged her back, and tears started to fall.

“It’s all okay, i promise.”

“He loves you, I’ve seen the way he looks at you.”

“Really?” I looked at her, teary eyed.

“Yes,” She stroked my hair.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

“You’re the strongest person I know, trust me, _you’re gonna be fine_.”

Time had passed. Then I saw Jase, his brunette hair flopping in the wind, his smile shining bright.

“Hey, are you okay?” He came up and asked me.

“No.” I Whispered.

_Did I have the courage to say anything?? What do I say? _

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked.

I finally just spat the words out, “I miss you.”

“Oh..” He scratched his head.

“Look, I know you broke up with me, but I can’t go on like this anymore, my heart burns for you, there’s not a moment I don’t think of you, please put me out of my misery and answer me.”

His upper lip slightly raised and he looked as if he was gonna say something.

“I’m so grateful you said that. It’s been hard, I can’t not think of your smile, or the way you play with your bracelet, the way you get nervous around other people, _but_ feel safe with me.”

I smiled, then cupped his face.

He put his temple amongst mine.

And we just hugged. I missed him, _this_.

But there wasn’t a moment I didn’t think of him. How i felt safe around him, how he always made sure I was okay, and always cared about me. The way he cares for others, and how he always smiles at everyone, helps grandmas carry they’re groceries.