It began with Mr. Kellogg.

I killed him because of his moustache, because it never suited his chubby face. It was easy to stage a suicide, and I felt exhilarated.

My next opportunity was Mr Bran, someone who moved in next door and kept playing his music too loud. I put up with it for a while but it came to a head when he played the same song on loop for three days.

The police were suspicious, but never suspected me.

To be save, I moved two states over and met Mr and Mrs Granola, who argued all the time about bills.

One night after a screaming match, I made sure they wouldn’t argue about bills anymore…

But then I thought, funny how everyone I’ve killed sound like cereal…

I set my sights on Miss Shreddie once the heat died down.