This is absolutely the last dating app I’m trying. I’ve been on three before this one and there wasn’t a single right swipe. Well, that’s not true. There was one, but I was actually trying to flick a piece of shredded cheese that fell off my taco from my screen. That DM was an awkward one. No offense to the guy, but he didn’t even check his profile picture before he posted it. I need a bit classier than someone smiling into the camera while sitting on the toilet. Mirrors, people. Seriously. But I’m giving it one last try with a new app aptly named “Why Not?”.

I’ve been scrolling for half an hour now, only partially paying attention while multitasking my way through some work files and dirty dishes. So far I’ve seen a couple I took note of that seemed like they may be interesting, if nothing else. But about six left swipes later I dropped my jaw and then I dropped my phone. And, no, it wasn’t because the man was ‘knock your socks off’ gorgeous, although he could definitely be considered as such. It was more or less the only response my brain had at the time to the shock of who the face belonged to. My very, very married ex husband, Thomas. Carly, his wife of SIX WEEKS, just got their wedding photos back and posted her favorites to all her socials. There are TikTok videos of the reception! Now, here is where I’m conflicted. See, I know it’s not an old account because he had shoulder length hair up until she asked him to cut it before the wedding and his hair is short here. So I could definitely show Carly the profile, but, she is the kind of person that would say I made this up and created this out of jealousy. I’m somewhat of a technical genius and I’m totally capable of doing that. Easy peasy. And since we got divorced because he left me for her, that could very easily seem plausible.

I could email Thomas and tell him I know his secret. I could make a fake social and send Carly the link. I could also just leave it all the way alone.

After pondering my options for what felt like hours, I decided the best thing I could do…was swipe right.