Finally
The day I’ve been waiting for is finally here!
I wake up in the morning thinking of my plan. The plan that’s been in my head for a long period of time. Something that is so important for me. Something I have always wished for. Desired. Wanted. Yearned for. Searched for. Needed. And planned forever. I am glad I finally have put my plan together.
It’s written on paper word for word. Every letter written beautifully on paper. A letter written for every person I adore. Family. Friend. “People that should be my family but I fucked those chances up.” The family that I always hoped to be part of with the man I love.
I apologize to everyone for causing so much harm, but the greatest day of my life is finally here. The day that we’ve all been waiting for and expected to happen. The day I’ve been planning for many years. Such a day that I’d consider most beautiful. A day that would bring me so much joy.
I have been counting the years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes, seconds, milliseconds, etc. And it’s finally here. I have never felt so much excitement and joy in my life, but this day has arrived. I can finally be at peace.
The day I decide to make myself fade away has come. The last selfish thing I’ll ever do. Then, it’s all over from there. I don’t have to be anyone else’s burden. I don’t have to cause stress, pain, anger, trauma, damage on anyone. I no longer have to worry about being called annoying, dumb, retarded, idiot, stupid bitch, waste of space, embarrassing, a joke, sicko, freak, talkative, naive, slut, sneaky, rotten, toxic, disgusting, good for nothing, piece of shit, Whore. Aka. I want to my l live in a mountain area where no one would judge me. I wouldn’t have to worry about my actions. I would be free.