All I want to do is see Maisie. I want to get lost in her blue eyes. I want to imagine us in a different lifetime where I’m not the one who killed her mother.

Sammy’s words keep echoing through my mind. You’d have to be an absolute fool to think you can keep lying to her about this.

Maybe the reason her words haven’t just left my mind—like they usually do—is because part of me beileves it.

I care about Maisie. I keep telling myself that the reason I don’t tell her is because I care too mcuh.

Do I care too much about hurting Maisie . . . Or about hurting myself? I’ve been telling myself it’s Maisie. It has to be. She’s all I can think about.

I roll over in my bed, grabbing my phone from the bedside table. I have to shut my eyes when the bright light shines in my face.

It’s four thirty seven in the morning. I haven’t slept all night, I’ve just been thinking. About Maisie, about what Sammy told me.

I unlock my phone, it opens to my recent converstation with Maisie. I read the time that hovers above each message.

I scroll up, watching as the time above the message grows bigger and bigger.

I smile as my thumbs get ready to type out a message.

“No!” I groan quietly. “I can’t do this.”

I throw my phone on the end of my bed, grabbing my pillow and stuffing the side of my face into the soft feathers.

I close my eyes, waiting for sleep to take me away. To a place where I don’t listen to my sister. Where I text Maisie and pretend like I’m just a normal boy. Not the boy who killed her mom.

It feels like hours pass by before I sit up and reach for my phone.

I flash the screen on, blinking as the light kilsl my eyes again. Disappointment floods through my viens as I see the time.

It’s five ten. It’s barely been thirty minutes.

I hate this! Sammy’s wrong, who cares if I never tell Maisie that I crashed into her car. People go their whole lives without spilling their deepest, darkest secrets. Who says I can’t keep this from Maisie?

There are more important things I need to tell her anyways. Things that wouldn’t break her heart.

I throw my blanket off my legs, jumping out of bed. I run down the stairs, skipping the last one like I’ve always done.

I pull open the front door, sprinting through the wet grass. Houses blur past me, as the rain starts soaking my shoulders.

I stop at the comforting blue house. Holding my chest as my lungs burn, I take deep breathes searching around for the window.

I smile, my mouth open as I take in the cold morning air.

The lights in Maisie’s room are off. Which, I guess makes perfect sense. I jog up to her window, tapping gently on the glass.

When she doesn’t come, I tap again this time louder.

“Maisie!” I call softly, pressing my palms to the cool glass. “It’s me!”

In the darkness I see a shadow move. My heart starts beating faster as Maisie’s face becomes clear in the moon light.

She searches the window sill for a second before she opens it.

Her blonde hair is messy and her blue eyes look more tired than worried.

“Davian?” She asks rubbing her face. “What are you doing here?”

“I love you,” I say the words without even thinking through the possible endings of this early morning. “I love you Mase.”

Maisie looks wide awake now, as she raises a hand to her mouth. “Davian.” She whispers.

I smile, still out of breath from my run. “Maisie I’ve been trying to figure out what it is I need in my life.” I pause when she her eyes shine with confusion. “About who to trust. Me or other people in my life.”

Maisie parts her lips about to break apart my speech.

“I want you,” I say before she can. “There’s no way I can’t not want you.”

Maisie’s parts her lips, her eyes soft as she stares into mine. “Davian.” She whispers.