I’m tired of waiting Always waiting Wondering when you’ll notice I gave you so many signs It’s not hard to understand That I’m not what you Want me to be When do I have to Destroy the perfect picture Of the girl you think I am I’m sitting here My world spinning My heart pumping Too fast Too slow My thoughts scattered But you don’t know You can’t see it You won’t see it “They can find it in anyone” That’s not how it works When do I have to tell you When do I give up The hope of being perfect Fitting into your box Fitting in Some people won’t like That I’m saying all of this It makes them feel invalidated Or something like that But when do I get to say That I know myself Well enough to tell I don’t want to destroy her The dream daughter That you see me as But she never really existed in the first place When I walked in circles Around Around Around you You told me “Stop sharking” Like I wanted to in the first place That was a sign When I sast in class And my mind started reeling My heart running When I felt dizzy At the thought of being called on That was a sign When I wouldn’t eat anything That wasn’t beige And cheesy And simple When I didn’t finish my cereal If it got even a little soggy When I wouldn’t eat anything That I didn’t deem “normal” That was a sign When I used the carpet To dry my hands Because I hated the feel Of the towels That was a sign When I couldn’t sleep Unless you held me Read to me At the same time every night In the same place The same voice Or I wouldn’t sleep That was a sign How many signs does it take To break the box To free myself To get what I need How many signs does it take To destroy the person You think I am