I should be asleep.

I can’t sleep.

These socks are sweaty and gross.

GET THEM OFF!

much better

The blanket is worse. I don’t want to feel my feet touching. Come on. Come on. Stop stop.

Don’t break your glasses.

What if I fall off the roof cleaning the gutters tomorrow?

I don’t want to sleep yet.

Why is my head itchy

Maybe I should shower now. It’s 12:54AM. Be smart. This is smart, my hair is gross and I’m not tired. Okay but if you shower now you’ll just stay up playing that fishing game.

And? It’s relaxing, isn’t that what you’re supposed to be doing? Relaxing.

No you’re supposed to be preparing yourself for Monday. Let’s not talk about Monday. It’s okay. You’re okay.

Deep breath.

Just stop. You’re still here. That’s huge.

We are going to out live that son of a b**ch who used God to groom you. We are going to keep loving people the way we were raised. You don’t need the church. You just keep those chairs open at your table. I know you’re super controversial but hey, Jesus was pretty controversial too. Everyone hated him and hell who doesn’t hate the lesbian Christian (I’m the lesbian Christian) just a little. I really love who I am though. Truly I do.

I love the idea of going to church on Sunday and coming home to my wife who I get to praise and thank everyday. How lucky am I to love women.

That’s my future. That’s why I’m still here.

It’s going to be great.

I’m good. I’m okay.

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Author’s Note: 1:30AM, just ate half a burger and a cookie. Goodnight yall