**Chapter 2**

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Davian

I gasp, fear rushing through my veins as I open my eyes. My hands tremble as search for the buckle. I need to get out of here.

I find the buckle, my shaking fingers pressing it down multiple times, before I’m able to break free of the tight belt that’s squeezing my chest.

I force the white bag, that’s exploded in front of me, out of my way, trying to see what’s happened. What have I done?

My hand reaches for the cold handle, I pull it out, shoving my weight onto the door. Another gasp escapes me as the door flies open, sending me tumbling to the rough ground.

I stumble to my feet, my knees dripping with blood from the fall or was that from the crash, from the cracked window?

My head throbs with pain as I drag myself across the shattered glass that’s all around my car. I don’t remember what happened. It all happened so fast. I closed my eyes, I felt the wind blowing wildly around me, and then what? I crashed into a tree? I hit a deer?

I look around my car, but there’s nothing. No body or blood, and I’m way too far away from the edge of the road to have hit a tree. So what? What did I—

Blood drains from my face, my legs grow weak, sweat beads on my forehead, as I look into the darkness. There’s another car.

My hands rise to my head, as I stare at this mess. This car, these people. They’re way worse than me. Their silver car is on it’s roof, it looks flat, like it’s been stepped on.

_Crap!_ I think as I bite my lower lip, drawing a small amount of blood. _What the heck have I done?_

My legs carry me over to the car, little pieces of shattered glass twinkling as I brush my feet passed them. My heart is pounding, my palms wet with sweat or maybe that’s blood. I stumble closer to the car, the white moon glinting off a piece of glass as I fall to my knees, inches away from this disaster.

“What have you done?” I cup of my wet hands over my mouth. “What have you done?”

I shut my eyes, feeling the rush of tears. The smell of raw, coppery blood floating all around me.

Without warning I start sobbing. My vision of the dark world around me becomes blurry. My cheeks become wet, and my chest. My chest still holds a beating heart. My heart should be dead, I did this. I hurt these people. I shouldn’t be alive.

Tears stream down my face, as I gasp out sobs, my chest heavy with guilt, with the unbearable pain that I did this. That I—Davian Chase, the boy who’s lost his parents, who knows this pain— just made someone else have to feel it too.

Two bright lights flash through the darkness. I start crying even harder now. Tommy, my hero older brother who saves lives, who fights burning flames, now gets to see that he really is the son Mom and Dad wanted.

“Davian!” I hear Tommy’s voice, followed by the slamming of the truck’s door. “Davian!”

I don’t move, or turn around. I know Tommy sees me, I know what he’s thinking. His arms wrap around my neck, his head pressed deep into my shoulder as his breathes come out in short gasps.

“Davey?” Allie’s worried voice rings through the darkness. Then I feel her too. Her warm touch on my cheek, her relived sigh that brings me comfort. “Are you okay?” She asks.

Physically I’m fine. But mentally, I’m a mess, an even bigger mess than before. “No,” I sob softly as she wipes my tears away with her hand.

“Davey,” she mumbles. “It’s going to be alright.”

“It’s my fault.” I cry.

“It’s not—”

“I closed my eyes, I thought the road was empty, I lost control of the car. I killed—”

Tommy lifts his head off my shoulder, still holding onto me. “Hey!” He says. “This isn’t your fault!”

“Then who’s fault is it!” I yell, a lot louder than I wanted. I can’t hold it in anymore. All this anger, all this pain. I can’t hold it anymore. “It’s my fault.”

Allie moves her hand off my cheek, reaching for the pocket on her jeans. “I’m gonna call for help.” She whispers softly to Tommy before standing up and walking a few feet away.

Tommy pulls me around to face him. “You freaked me out.” He mumbles, his hands cupping my face. “Don’t you ever, and I mean _ever, _do that to me again? You hear me?”

I nod once, avoiding his hazel eyes. I know they’re Mom’s, and Mom can’t see me like this.

Tommy lifts my face up, forcing me to do what I can’t. “Look at me.” He orders. I do. I meet his pale eyes, and then it all falls.

“I didn’t mean to,” I choke out, my eyes still on Mom’s. “I didn’t mean to.”

Tommy pulls me into a strong hug, his hands holding my head close to his chest. “I know D.”

. . .

I was glad when I heard the loud sirens of the police cars and ambulance. When I saw the bright blue and red flashing lights that blinded me. First I wanted them to help the people I’d hurt, and second I wanted them to arrest me. I was hoping they would.

But all they did was wrap me in a warm, heavy blanket, after they’d cared for the cuts on my knees, palms and forehead. I watched as a group of doctors rushed to the car, two cots wheeling behind them. Two lives crumpled in that car. They pulled out the people, instantly laying them on the cots to begin CPR. I knew the results of the crash when one life was covered by a single white blanket, when the doctors looked up at the black sky, swearing at who ever was controlling this world. I swore too, even when I saw that one life had been saved, one life was still missing from existence. And it was all because of me.

Tommy wanted to take me home right when the cops came, or his eyes did. Mom did. He’d talked with the police, Allie by his side the whole time. Their hands never leaving each other, and my eyes never leaving their grasp. I want that. It’s stupid and selfish. I don’t deserve it. I never did.

The ambulance left practically right when it came. The police stuck around, I’m not sure why. I guess I haven’t ever really been in this place before. I’ve never even been five feet from an ambulance, and yet tonight I was sitting on one while they fixed me up. Things change in minutes. People are born, people are lost. Minutes are fractions of life, and they matter more than we give them credit for.

I stayed on the side of the road, watching as Tommy and Allie waved the police off. They turned to me, hands still tied together.

“Everything’s good,” Tommy says as he reaches his hand out, helping me up. “It was an accident on a hard night. Police are people, they understand.”

He’s lying, killing and hurting isn’t something you just let go of because of a bad night. Or else murders would say they’re having a bad night, every single person in jail for whatever reason wouldn’t be there right now, if that were the case. Yet I don’t even care, I’m tired, I’m so tired.

Allie sat in the back of the truck with me her arm around my shoulders as I rested my head against her’s. She held me tight, tighter than I’d ever been held after doing something bad.

“It’s gonna be alright,” Allie whispers in my ear as we drive along the dark road. Her gentle hand running slowly through my hair. My eyes barely even open as I nod slowly. Her words echoing in my mind.

_It’s gonna be alright. It’s gonna be alright._

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(This is my second chapter. I’m thinking maybe to rewrite the whole story but just with Davian’s perspective. He just seemed like the better one to tell the story, but I could be wrong. Comment and tell me what you think)